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Saturday, May 29, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
CALVIN! Where's the TYRE!!!?
As much as I have a permanent inertia against leaving home (unless its for r a movie or hanging out with friends), I do have a couple of relatives who I visit sometimes just not to alienate myself( and of course, for the food ;) ). Ah,such adorable kids they have.Who wouldn't wanna spend time with their nieces or kid-cousins, who entertain you with their sweet-talk, hug you and generally make you feel happy? Hehe, you guys already know I'm kidding(or "kid"ding,if you please),right? They are nothing less than devil- incarnate,believe me!. The "Enfant terrible"s have put me in such screwy situations they made me wish that I could disapparate (to disappear magically,HP) to the top of a lava-spurting Eyjafjallajökull. I think most people will relate to the below scenarios :
Scene 1
I enter the house. The kids look at me and go "Yaayyyyy! Pavananna has come! Yaayy"! I reply cheerfully "Hiii Ankita!How did your exams go?" My mistake. Her mom,who was happily welcoming me till now,turns grim within a split-second and goes spiraling in a non-stop tirade on how the girl has left one "fill-in-the-blanks" blank (The heading says Fill-in-the-blank.How can she leave it blank? :D) and done a multiple choice question wrong and so she'll end up getting only 96.5% , and not 99.4% (as the next door aunty's son haughtily claimed of getting). All this while Ms.Ankita looks daggers at me,muttering under her breath, "You $@#@#,I'll have my revenge". But soon everything is forgotten and we start playing and talking.
Scene 2
Everyone is watching TV. Suddenly the little devil yells "PAVANANNA, I WANNA PLAY WITH YOUR MOBILE.GIMME YOUR MOBILE!". I oblige immediately, foolishly assuming that its better than the cacophony blasting my eardrums now. She occupies herself with the mobile for sometime while peace prevails (Noises from the TV are not even comparable). And suddenly, "PAVANANNA,YOU GOT A MSG FROM SO-N-SO GAL.IT SAYS 'WASSUP?WHAT U DOIN''" I instinctively take furtive glances at the elders in the room,who, I am pretty certain, even with their heads firmly turned towards the TV, have all their ears on my side of the room now. They need not have struggled so much.My ever-inquisitive niece is not one to be silenced so soon. As I give a nervous fake smile and reach for my mobile,she starts off, "WHO IS THIS SO-N-SO GAL???IS SHE YOUR GIRLFRIENDDDD? HEE HEE, ARE YOU GONNA MARRRRY HER?HEE HEE" (Wait! WHAA....?) Now everyone else has no excuse to even look at the TV and have completely focussed their attention on me. I meekly & defensively say "Noooo" with a stupid guffaw (I dunno why I felt compulsive to answer a 9-year old) Then I begin my Rescue-thy-pride mission : keep staring down at the mobile with such ferocious single-mindedness & concentration that any outsider would believe I'm writing down the proof for a complex quantum theory equation which will disprove The Theory of Relativity and turn science,as we know it,upside down (Einstein would gape in horror and awe from his grave). And I stick to that stance until a messiah on the reality show TV yells something and everyone turns back to him
Scene 3
Me & my niece are sitting watching "Spongebob Squarepants" on Nick. After 20 minutes of marvellingon how these over-smart kids still enjoy something so dumb(and thanking god for that), I ask "Naina,can I have the remote? I'm bored". "Nooooo,only 10 minutes more and the episode will get over. Then I've give you the remote.OK?" she says blinking her eyes ever innocently. I smile and say "OK". Just then,the TV blares "....and stay tuned for the 2-hour weekend special of SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!"
She goes "Yaaay!"
"Hey come on, you said you'll give me the remote"
"Baaaaaahhhh!Waaaaaaaahhhh!"
"Ok ok. You keep the remote.I'll just go home...and never vist you again" (hee hee hee)
She contemplates once this for a while. "Okay fine. I will give you the remote.You can watch whattttever you want......till I come back from the bathroom!" and runs off leaving me open-mouthed.
I relax for a while and keep surfing channels wondering if anything good ever comes on this idiot box. A particularly riveting sequence in one of the English movie channels holds my attention for more than usual and I linger on for a little while more. (I'll remind you here,Murphy's law are not some random bullshit.Never ignore them) Right at that moment,the little devil comes running back to claim her remote. She turns to the TV and is horrified by what she is seeing. "CHEEEE! MUMMIE!!! PAVANANNA IS WATCHING GIRL AND BOY KISSING!!!" I can't help shouting out inadvertently "Heyyy! Shhhh. They are just kissing". As they say,the damage is done. What I would not give to just evaporate from the face of the earth in a puff of smoke that very instant. I fumble with the remote while that abominable thing is playing on TV,*click* (Priyanka Chopra in a luscious bikini in Dostana) *click* random woman dancing in rain in a South Indian movie *more frantic click* "This is Atul Mehta,Mumbai correspondent,Aaj Tak" Sigh.Safe.All this happens in a time frame of 15 seconds.My cousin laughs a bit and just stays in the kitchen,thankfully. I do not touch the remote the whole of my stay there and settle down to watch back-back episodes of Spongebob squarepants.
Scene 4
Little devil's teen-aged elder sis comes in.They start arguing over something and start fighting and the elder one goes "Get the f*uck off me,moron". The smaller one claps her hand to her mouth,
"Akka! You just said the F-U-C-K word! Wait I'll tell mommy"
"Shudd-up!I didn't, Reee-tard" (My uncle is US returned. So my cousins still retain a distinct accent.Cool stuff)
"Yes you did!Pavananna she said the F-U-C-K word, didn't she?"
I was already grinning."Yeah,she did".
"Reee-tard,get lost" and she storms out of the room.
The younger one starts giving me gyan "Dad told me F-U-C-K & S-U-C-K are bad words. But I think "shit" & "crap" are OK.They didn't scold me when I used them.And speaking of scolding, B-I-T-C-H is a bad word too."(ponders a bit)"But I wanna know what F-U-C-K means? Do you know what that means?"
"Ah,I don't know" trying to sound as ignorant as possible, to which I get a "Man,You are a dumbo.All elders know that.How old are you anyway?"
Scene 5
We are sitting around for dinner. Ms.Smartypants is at it again. Giggling she says, "Amma,Pavananna is hesitating to serve the rice for himself. I think he is feeling shy. Pavananna,go ahead. There is lot of rice for all of us" As much as this is most embarassing,more annoying and scary is the fact that those were the exact thoughts going on in my head.Phew,kids these days! Anyways, I get over the hiccup and continue eating with a lot of rice in my plate now. Her mom comes,serves her a gulab jamun and goes inside to get more. Little devil turns sweet "Amma,bari nange hakidiyalla.Paapa ivninge haakalva Jamun-u? (You served the jamun only to me.Why didnt you serve the jamun to him, Poor guy)".Her mom says mockingly "No I wont give him. He's nobody to me". "Ayyo Paapa,aa thara ella madbaardu.Kodamma (Ayyo Poor thing,we should not act like this.Lets give him too)". We couldn't stop laughing. Its amazing how kids balance their minds with the inherent innocence which is part of growing-up and the pseudo-maturity they acquire from their surroundings.
P.S : I love my nieces,nephews and kid-cousins. They are better than the elders,anyday ;)
P.P.S : This is my tribute to Calvin & Hobbes,the greatest comic ever
Scene 1
I enter the house. The kids look at me and go "Yaayyyyy! Pavananna has come! Yaayy"! I reply cheerfully "Hiii Ankita!How did your exams go?" My mistake. Her mom,who was happily welcoming me till now,turns grim within a split-second and goes spiraling in a non-stop tirade on how the girl has left one "fill-in-the-blanks" blank (The heading says Fill-in-the-blank.How can she leave it blank? :D) and done a multiple choice question wrong and so she'll end up getting only 96.5% , and not 99.4% (as the next door aunty's son haughtily claimed of getting). All this while Ms.Ankita looks daggers at me,muttering under her breath, "You $@#@#,I'll have my revenge". But soon everything is forgotten and we start playing and talking.
Scene 2
Everyone is watching TV. Suddenly the little devil yells "PAVANANNA, I WANNA PLAY WITH YOUR MOBILE.GIMME YOUR MOBILE!". I oblige immediately, foolishly assuming that its better than the cacophony blasting my eardrums now. She occupies herself with the mobile for sometime while peace prevails (Noises from the TV are not even comparable). And suddenly, "PAVANANNA,YOU GOT A MSG FROM SO-N-SO GAL.IT SAYS 'WASSUP?WHAT U DOIN''" I instinctively take furtive glances at the elders in the room,who, I am pretty certain, even with their heads firmly turned towards the TV, have all their ears on my side of the room now. They need not have struggled so much.My ever-inquisitive niece is not one to be silenced so soon. As I give a nervous fake smile and reach for my mobile,she starts off, "WHO IS THIS SO-N-SO GAL???IS SHE YOUR GIRLFRIENDDDD? HEE HEE, ARE YOU GONNA MARRRRY HER?HEE HEE" (Wait! WHAA....?) Now everyone else has no excuse to even look at the TV and have completely focussed their attention on me. I meekly & defensively say "Noooo" with a stupid guffaw (I dunno why I felt compulsive to answer a 9-year old) Then I begin my Rescue-thy-pride mission : keep staring down at the mobile with such ferocious single-mindedness & concentration that any outsider would believe I'm writing down the proof for a complex quantum theory equation which will disprove The Theory of Relativity and turn science,as we know it,upside down (Einstein would gape in horror and awe from his grave). And I stick to that stance until a messiah on the reality show TV yells something and everyone turns back to him
Scene 3
Me & my niece are sitting watching "Spongebob Squarepants" on Nick. After 20 minutes of marvellingon how these over-smart kids still enjoy something so dumb(and thanking god for that), I ask "Naina,can I have the remote? I'm bored". "Nooooo,only 10 minutes more and the episode will get over. Then I've give you the remote.OK?" she says blinking her eyes ever innocently. I smile and say "OK". Just then,the TV blares "....and stay tuned for the 2-hour weekend special of SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!"
She goes "Yaaay!"
"Hey come on, you said you'll give me the remote"
"Baaaaaahhhh!Waaaaaaaahhhh!"
"Ok ok. You keep the remote.I'll just go home...and never vist you again" (hee hee hee)
She contemplates once this for a while. "Okay fine. I will give you the remote.You can watch whattttever you want......till I come back from the bathroom!" and runs off leaving me open-mouthed.
I relax for a while and keep surfing channels wondering if anything good ever comes on this idiot box. A particularly riveting sequence in one of the English movie channels holds my attention for more than usual and I linger on for a little while more. (I'll remind you here,Murphy's law are not some random bullshit.Never ignore them) Right at that moment,the little devil comes running back to claim her remote. She turns to the TV and is horrified by what she is seeing. "CHEEEE! MUMMIE!!! PAVANANNA IS WATCHING GIRL AND BOY KISSING!!!" I can't help shouting out inadvertently "Heyyy! Shhhh. They are just kissing". As they say,the damage is done. What I would not give to just evaporate from the face of the earth in a puff of smoke that very instant. I fumble with the remote while that abominable thing is playing on TV,*click* (Priyanka Chopra in a luscious bikini in Dostana) *click* random woman dancing in rain in a South Indian movie *more frantic click* "This is Atul Mehta,Mumbai correspondent,Aaj Tak" Sigh.Safe.All this happens in a time frame of 15 seconds.My cousin laughs a bit and just stays in the kitchen,thankfully. I do not touch the remote the whole of my stay there and settle down to watch back-back episodes of Spongebob squarepants.
Scene 4
Little devil's teen-aged elder sis comes in.They start arguing over something and start fighting and the elder one goes "Get the f*uck off me,moron". The smaller one claps her hand to her mouth,
"Akka! You just said the F-U-C-K word! Wait I'll tell mommy"
"Shudd-up!I didn't, Reee-tard" (My uncle is US returned. So my cousins still retain a distinct accent.Cool stuff)
"Yes you did!Pavananna she said the F-U-C-K word, didn't she?"
I was already grinning."Yeah,she did".
"Reee-tard,get lost" and she storms out of the room.
The younger one starts giving me gyan "Dad told me F-U-C-K & S-U-C-K are bad words. But I think "shit" & "crap" are OK.They didn't scold me when I used them.And speaking of scolding, B-I-T-C-H is a bad word too."(ponders a bit)"But I wanna know what F-U-C-K means? Do you know what that means?"
"Ah,I don't know" trying to sound as ignorant as possible, to which I get a "Man,You are a dumbo.All elders know that.How old are you anyway?"
Scene 5
We are sitting around for dinner. Ms.Smartypants is at it again. Giggling she says, "Amma,Pavananna is hesitating to serve the rice for himself. I think he is feeling shy. Pavananna,go ahead. There is lot of rice for all of us" As much as this is most embarassing,more annoying and scary is the fact that those were the exact thoughts going on in my head.Phew,kids these days! Anyways, I get over the hiccup and continue eating with a lot of rice in my plate now. Her mom comes,serves her a gulab jamun and goes inside to get more. Little devil turns sweet "Amma,bari nange hakidiyalla.Paapa ivninge haakalva Jamun-u? (You served the jamun only to me.Why didnt you serve the jamun to him, Poor guy)".Her mom says mockingly "No I wont give him. He's nobody to me". "Ayyo Paapa,aa thara ella madbaardu.Kodamma (Ayyo Poor thing,we should not act like this.Lets give him too)". We couldn't stop laughing. Its amazing how kids balance their minds with the inherent innocence which is part of growing-up and the pseudo-maturity they acquire from their surroundings.
P.S : I love my nieces,nephews and kid-cousins. They are better than the elders,anyday ;)
P.P.S : This is my tribute to Calvin & Hobbes,the greatest comic ever
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Aitalakadi - A translation beyond words...
Nothing can beat Kannada song lyrics.Time and again the song-writers in Sandalwood have come up with such gems that you have to give it to them just for creativity and innovation. You think they can't do better than a jinke mari na and within no time they will amaze and floor you with a Hale paatre or a Chitranna chitranna. I thought I will attempt to translate one such song. On some careful research, found this popular(and catchy, I admit) song of our challenging star Darshan.Lets try to decipher how the lyricist is conveying the everylasting love and pining between the two lovers with his words:
(guy)Aithalakadi...Aithalakadi..Aithalakadi
I am stumped!!! Done in at the very first word! I don't have a goddamn clue what this erudite sounding wording means. I shall just ignore it for the time being and try to catch the context. I proceed tentatively to the next sentence....
(guy)Aithalakadi... jala jala jala jalajakshi, mina mina mina meenakshi, kama kama kama kamakshi , pata pata pata pancharangi.... baare..... Aithalakadi baare ...
Oh this is too fast!!! Wait wait wait! Jalajakshi, Meenakshi, Kamakshi, Pancharangi - Hmmm my wild guess is that he's rolling out names of his several girlfriends there. Or a better guess might be that he's addressing the one girl present there with all these names. (Ah, this seems more logical too. Our heroineis still dancing with glee even after hearing all the names). And coming to the words, jala jala jala, mina mina mina, kama kama kama, pata pata pata .... don't even try! A sublime touch to the proceedings which only an accomplished poet of his stature can give.This is what you call poetic license,ladies. Indeed, how lame would those lines be if not for these musical notes,right on spot.
(girl) Lagna madsumma,valga oodsumma,oota haksumma, kattiko,kattiko
(guy) Horn gatsumma, Haadna hadsumma, Love na torsumma......
Basically the lass is super impressed with the guy and tells him to marry her soon. And basically the guy wants to get horny,sing songs and make love. As you can clearly see, the poet is trying to convey the typical feelings of both sexes in a mass-y,easily understandable way.
And just after that comes a line which blew my mind away. A once-in-a-century line. The 'piece-de-resistance' of the entire song. . Here it goes ...
(guy)....Yama yama buka duma naka duma muta duma..Aithalakadiiiiiiiiiii
Such subtlety. Such melody. Seems like he is calling upon the Indian mythological god of death Yama and...Errr...Errrr..Calling him Dumma (Fat)!!!!? Lets not tread any further here, or I am directly going to hell!
(Skip to the most insightful stanza of the song )
(girl) Naaaati naaaati benne naa, peeeete meeeete tuppana tintiya
At this point, the guy gets really hungry and tired of all he dancing, so the girl is offering him naati benne (just extracted butter,correct?) and peete meete tuppa (and ghee. The peete and meete are again products of poetic license). Surely she loves the guy so much she is not worried about the cholesterol or the fat calories on him
(guy) Benne maiyya henne, mutkondre metkontaiyte,
Yaargu kammi illa ,vayyara wine agayte
(There goes. The guy gets horny again. This idiot just needs a hint to start off! ) O Lass with a butter-like body, its getting sticky when I touch it. (Wow! Mind blown, second time. Such sensuousness and aesthetically presented eroticism in a movie song, can you imagine? I take my hat off, Mr.Lyricist. Further he says) Your ostentatious and showy display is turning into alcohol and no one will have shortage now. Devdas in the making...lolz :P
(girl)White-u white-u white-u white-u ......
White-u Rajnikanth neenu
The girl is comparing the guy to a white Rajn- WHAAA!!!? Oh yeah! She says the guy looks like a WHITE Rajnikanth. So you mean Rajnikanth is BLACK??? Now now, that's not so 'fair' (pun intended :D). The intention of this jab/seemingly racist comment at the Tamil Superstar in a massy Kannada movie is not quite clear. Atleast not to me ;)
(guy) Yaake yaake hogultiya, height-u jasti madutiya
(guy)Why are you praising me and in doing so increasing my height?
Sheer brilliance. Our poet is in GODMODE now. I thought he was merely good with words, but being aware of the latest developments in scientific research and using that in his songs? (Surely you guys have read about the study which says if you keep praising someone continuously and repeatedly over a period of time, a distinct increase in the height of a person is observed). One word : G-E-N-I-U-S.
And now again we are greeted with the mellifluous and dulcet tones of the starting words which had us floored in the beginning itself...
(guy n girl together)Aithalakadi...Aithalakadi..Aithalakadi....
Someone please catch hold of this guy atleast now and give him an award. Create a new one and give it to him. For the love of god, people!!!
Oh btw, enjoy the video of the song here ;)
Monday, March 22, 2010
One day at Office...
I had no- I didn't have much work at office today. So I sat down to write limericks. I have to say office atmosphere is not very conducive for this kind of writing, but I got a few going and thought of the rest on the bus back home. Presenting to you, my first attempt at poetry. Torture yourself :D
*
There was once a girl called Rachel
Everyday she updated her facebook status without fail
One day it said "I just brushed my teeth"
The next "My boyfriend Peter is a big cheat"
Peter saw this and got his face frowned
Next day his status said "Me and Rachel went to the river and she tragically drowned"
*
There was once a boy called Pavan
He was leading a good life; simple, peaceful and loven'
His mom dad started bugging him "Get married, son get married"
And poor Pavan kept running away,looking frightened and harried
Found a safe spot and made a secret wish to Santa,
Ab kya bataon, Aage ki lines(sigh)....... main nahi jaanta ;)
*
There were test matches and players wore whites
Now there is IPL and all you see is slaps and fist fights
There were batsmen who made stadiums illuminate
Now there are disguised Bajrang Dal activists with a rod making me hallucinate :P
*
Once there was a guy called blogger,
None of what he wrote induced an iota of laughter,
Entire life all he did was slog,slog,slog
His last words were "Please check my BLOG" :D
*
Today I saw a hot maal at the mall,
Made my heart come out and fall,
Agreed she was no Ash Rai,
But I surely didnt wanna become her Rakhi Bhai,
Suddenly a fragrance threw me off her trail, I wonder
Mangoes have arrived, yay , who cares if the chick's legs are slender or thighs thunder ;-)
*
(Div)
There were two friends, so-so and Bheegi Billi,
What they actually wanted they didn't know,really
So they always ended up fighting each other silly
The hero in Avatar was called Mr.Jake Sully :)
*
There was once a girl called Rachel
Everyday she updated her facebook status without fail
One day it said "I just brushed my teeth"
The next "My boyfriend Peter is a big cheat"
Peter saw this and got his face frowned
Next day his status said "Me and Rachel went to the river and she tragically drowned"
*
There was once a boy called Pavan
He was leading a good life; simple, peaceful and loven'
His mom dad started bugging him "Get married, son get married"
And poor Pavan kept running away,looking frightened and harried
Found a safe spot and made a secret wish to Santa,
Ab kya bataon, Aage ki lines(sigh)....... main nahi jaanta ;)
*
There were test matches and players wore whites
Now there is IPL and all you see is slaps and fist fights
There were batsmen who made stadiums illuminate
Now there are disguised Bajrang Dal activists with a rod making me hallucinate :P
*
Once there was a guy called blogger,
None of what he wrote induced an iota of laughter,
Entire life all he did was slog,slog,slog
His last words were "Please check my BLOG" :D
*
Today I saw a hot maal at the mall,
Made my heart come out and fall,
Agreed she was no Ash Rai,
But I surely didnt wanna become her Rakhi Bhai,
Suddenly a fragrance threw me off her trail, I wonder
Mangoes have arrived, yay , who cares if the chick's legs are slender or thighs thunder ;-)
*
(Div)
There were two friends, so-so and Bheegi Billi,
What they actually wanted they didn't know,really
So they always ended up fighting each other silly
The hero in Avatar was called Mr.Jake Sully :)
Saturday, February 20, 2010
The Ultimate Wedding-Attendance Algorithm
Most of us in our age group have been attending friends' or colleague's marriages since sometime now and will have lot of marriages to attend in the near future too. And we are always faced with the dilemma of whether its worth the effort to attend the wedding or not. Like we recently attended a friend's wedding at the far end of the town and by the end of it were left high and dry (I am clearly assuming that 'friend' is too busy enjoying the early fruits of marital bliss to read this post). So as my friend and guru revered Rashmi Mata put it, few factors come into play when deciding whether to attend a wedding. I went ahead and developed a full fledged algorithm for the same: The Ultimate Wedding-Attendance Algorithm.
The basic concept of the algorithm is simple. Its the mind-boggling permutations and combinatorial possibilities of all the factors that makes it difficult to understand and implement than,say the P vs NP Problem. Lets cut out the talk and dive straight in :
/****************Variables****************/
/* global Variables */
you_are_married = 0
// Looks pleasant as long as it is 0.You will know why this is required as we go along
/* Level 0 variables : The most powerful ones. Any of these, if set, override all the other factors and leave you with little choice but to attend the wedding. Carefully set them to zero at the start or face the dire consequences */
is_a_close_relative = 0
is_a_close_friend = 0
is_your_manager = 0
/* Level 1 variables : Little less powerful but have more weightage than level 2,3 */
you_are_alive = 1
/* Means you are a ghost and not visible to anyone. Its a good situation to be in when you think about it, coz then you don't have to hide all your way to the stage to escape from aunties who will cast their blood-draining hold on your cheek and tug at it till your "Holy #$%#$% mother of Jesus" agony-filled shriek fills the hall. They would still they not let you go unless you agree to their "Its you next, babbby". Again be careful with this parameter else your life can become a paradox and then self-destruct */
you_are_zombie = 0
/*Tricky business this, being a zombie. Not that anyone will be idle enough to differentiate between a human and a zombie in an Indian wedding setting(except the prying elderly aunties, of course and your socially challenged & utterly clueless geek friends ,which you will have if you are an IT Professional like me ). Still its advisable to exercise caution when you finally get on the dais that you don't bite off the girl's hand or something when she tries to shake your hand. Remember : Subtlety is a virtue of great value */
/* I hope there is no confusion wrt to Level 0 & Level 1 till now. Just as an example, if its your manager's wedding , you WILL attend the wedding regardless of whether your a ghost or a zombie */
you_are_seriously_not_well_or_injured = 0
// My parameter names are self-explanatory ;)
you_are_giving_an_excuse_of_not_being_well = 0 // Very useful but to be used with caution
wedding_out_of_town = 0
/* Level 2 variables Also called Rash's params named after my friend who originally came up with this idea. Obviously the names will be the same as she quoted. You will learn the resourcefulness of these variables once we reach the algo */
venue_is_far_far = 0
date_is_a_wiikday = 0 // weekday
have_attended_your_wedding = 0
/* the bride or the groom have attended your wedding. Applicable only if the global variable you_are_married = 1 */
/*Level 3 variables */
pretty_girls_expected = 1
/*Always set to default value 1,being the eternal hopeful. This clearly has the potential to be at Level 0, but by precisely measuring the inherent ambiguity of the variable and the fatal effects it could have if given overriding powers, I had to place it at a safe Level 3 where it can do little harm to the individual's brain */
great_food_expected = 1 // Another ambiguous param , which can play with your mind and affect your body
relative_or_colleague_has_been_a_pain_in_the_ass = 0
/*Ethics force you to set it to zero by default. A powerful and volatile variable which can even override "is_a_close_relative" (a Level 0) depending on the situation */
/****************Algorithm****************/
/*Let me be clear when I say I will only be presenting a part of the algo here because the entire algorithm is so complex with its interplay of variables that it will eventually be a lost cause for the ordinary layman for whom its actually made. I will be very happy to share the entire algo with anyone who is interested. Also I have decided to make it open source so anyone can edit or improvise the same.*/
/* I am not going to use Level 0 variables here. Extreme caution is advised while using them. Dont them unless compulsary */
/*Combination of Level 1 & Level 2*/
if (you_are_zombie == 1 && venue_is_far_far == 1)
/* A special case. If you are a zombie and you have to travel far,
you would reach months after the wedding considering how fast
zombies walk or the probability of a zombie hitch-hiking */
{
chill_at_home_and_munch_on_man-wiches() // like sand-wiches ;)
}
/*All Level 2*/
if (venue_is_far_far && date_is_a_wiikday)
// Remember its a conditional AND. so all the conditions need to be satisfied
{
set you_are_giving_an_excuse_of_not_being_well = 1
go_home_from_office()
}
/*all Level 3*/
if (pretty_girls_expected == 1 || relative_has_been_a_pain_in_the_ass == 0 )
/* Though both are Level 3, considering its a conditional OR
and assuming the if condition is evaluated from L to R,
the control enters the if loop as soon as pretty_girls_expected = 1 regardless of whether the relative has been a pain
in the ass or not */
{
go_have_a_blast_ogling()
}
/* As you can see , lot of scenarios in the algo are special cases and hence code reusabilty cannot be a factor. I will not bore you with more code (i know its already a lot :P) Hope it helps you de-clutter your mind on the subject and consequently guarantee more attendance at your wedding too. Hasta la vista!*/
The basic concept of the algorithm is simple. Its the mind-boggling permutations and combinatorial possibilities of all the factors that makes it difficult to understand and implement than,say the P vs NP Problem. Lets cut out the talk and dive straight in :
/****************Variables****************/
/* global Variables */
you_are_married = 0
// Looks pleasant as long as it is 0.You will know why this is required as we go along
/* Level 0 variables : The most powerful ones. Any of these, if set, override all the other factors and leave you with little choice but to attend the wedding. Carefully set them to zero at the start or face the dire consequences */
is_a_close_relative = 0
is_a_close_friend = 0
is_your_manager = 0
/* Level 1 variables : Little less powerful but have more weightage than level 2,3 */
you_are_alive = 1
/* Means you are a ghost and not visible to anyone. Its a good situation to be in when you think about it, coz then you don't have to hide all your way to the stage to escape from aunties who will cast their blood-draining hold on your cheek and tug at it till your "Holy #$%#$% mother of Jesus" agony-filled shriek fills the hall. They would still they not let you go unless you agree to their "Its you next, babbby". Again be careful with this parameter else your life can become a paradox and then self-destruct */
you_are_zombie = 0
/*Tricky business this, being a zombie. Not that anyone will be idle enough to differentiate between a human and a zombie in an Indian wedding setting(except the prying elderly aunties, of course and your socially challenged & utterly clueless geek friends ,which you will have if you are an IT Professional like me ). Still its advisable to exercise caution when you finally get on the dais that you don't bite off the girl's hand or something when she tries to shake your hand. Remember : Subtlety is a virtue of great value */
/* I hope there is no confusion wrt to Level 0 & Level 1 till now. Just as an example, if its your manager's wedding , you WILL attend the wedding regardless of whether your a ghost or a zombie */
you_are_seriously_not_well_or_injured = 0
// My parameter names are self-explanatory ;)
you_are_giving_an_excuse_of_not_being_well = 0 // Very useful but to be used with caution
wedding_out_of_town = 0
/* Level 2 variables Also called Rash's params named after my friend who originally came up with this idea. Obviously the names will be the same as she quoted. You will learn the resourcefulness of these variables once we reach the algo */
venue_is_far_far = 0
date_is_a_wiikday = 0 // weekday
have_attended_your_wedding = 0
/* the bride or the groom have attended your wedding. Applicable only if the global variable you_are_married = 1 */
/*Level 3 variables */
pretty_girls_expected = 1
/*Always set to default value 1,being the eternal hopeful. This clearly has the potential to be at Level 0, but by precisely measuring the inherent ambiguity of the variable and the fatal effects it could have if given overriding powers, I had to place it at a safe Level 3 where it can do little harm to the individual's brain */
great_food_expected = 1 // Another ambiguous param , which can play with your mind and affect your body
relative_or_colleague_has_been_a_pain_in_the_ass = 0
/*Ethics force you to set it to zero by default. A powerful and volatile variable which can even override "is_a_close_relative" (a Level 0) depending on the situation */
/****************Algorithm****************/
/*Let me be clear when I say I will only be presenting a part of the algo here because the entire algorithm is so complex with its interplay of variables that it will eventually be a lost cause for the ordinary layman for whom its actually made. I will be very happy to share the entire algo with anyone who is interested. Also I have decided to make it open source so anyone can edit or improvise the same.*/
/* I am not going to use Level 0 variables here. Extreme caution is advised while using them. Dont them unless compulsary */
/*Combination of Level 1 & Level 2*/
if (you_are_zombie == 1 && venue_is_far_far == 1)
/* A special case. If you are a zombie and you have to travel far,
you would reach months after the wedding considering how fast
zombies walk or the probability of a zombie hitch-hiking */
{
chill_at_home_and_munch_on_man-wiches() // like sand-wiches ;)
}
/*All Level 2*/
if (venue_is_far_far && date_is_a_wiikday)
// Remember its a conditional AND. so all the conditions need to be satisfied
{
set you_are_giving_an_excuse_of_not_being_well = 1
go_home_from_office()
}
/*all Level 3*/
if (pretty_girls_expected == 1 || relative_has_been_a_pain_in_the_ass == 0 )
/* Though both are Level 3, considering its a conditional OR
and assuming the if condition is evaluated from L to R,
the control enters the if loop as soon as pretty_girls_expected = 1 regardless of whether the relative has been a pain
in the ass or not */
{
go_have_a_blast_ogling()
}
/* As you can see , lot of scenarios in the algo are special cases and hence code reusabilty cannot be a factor. I will not bore you with more code (i know its already a lot :P) Hope it helps you de-clutter your mind on the subject and consequently guarantee more attendance at your wedding too. Hasta la vista!*/
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Celeb resolutions
My friend Vinay calls me Paparazzi Potter. Motivated by the nick name, I have been doing some paparazzi work off late and have come across some interesting gossip,sorry truth,truth and nothing but truth. 2009 has seen many controversies and our celebrities have made resolutions for 2010.I have learned about some of these resolutions from our so called celebrities. Let's have a look.
Our honorable Minister of State, Shashi Tharoor has resolved to work for the External ministry through twitter only. So in the future, you may find tweets like these on Tharoor's page :
Kareena Kapoor was the only one in the country who actually understood what problem Shiv Sena had with this poster of Kurbaan-->
So her resolution for 2010 is have a poster with the positions reversed.She said in a press meet "I am sure the Shiv sainiks will have no complaints after this"
Pramod Mutalik's new year resolution is simple and straightforward. Attack more girls in public. According to a source, the Pink chaddi campaign didn't live upto their expectations and the party seniors are complaining that many cadres haven't got even one pink chaddi yet while the more powerful and influential ones are keeping all the chaddis
Barack Obama's resolution is to not do or say something which will get him another Nobel prize this year. "I will strive my level best," says a press release from Washington D.C. quoting the US President, "but I cannot guarantee that the Nobel committee will not decide to confer me the Peace Prize again. They are nice people.Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. Oh, I digress"
Tiger Woods has a resolution too . But just as he was announcing it, he saw a blonde passing by and before they could catch him, he was gone.
Satyam's RamaLinga Raju has other plans. He has just watched Shawshank Redemption in jail and now is planning to reprise Andy Dufrense's character in real life, but in a much professional and polished way than digging a hole for 20 years. He has planned to manipulate the records in the jail so much that there is will be no evidence that he was ever in jail. And finally he'll make a dramatic escape, something like in this pic.
In midst of all this, one man has made a silent resolution to himself. Or I wish he has. Hit a century in every match :D. Sachin Tendulkar : Switch to GODMODE!
Any other celebs whose resolutions you would wanna know? ;)
Happy New Year everyone! Let the FUN continue :)
Our honorable Minister of State, Shashi Tharoor has resolved to work for the External ministry through twitter only. So in the future, you may find tweets like these on Tharoor's page :
- Me n SMK (SM Krishna) met our Chinese cntrparts for dinner. I asked them to open their eyes and LOLd
- Writing this report while watching 'Dawn of the Dead'. Lyk it and hope I dont end up with a report on zombies ;)
So her resolution for 2010 is have a poster with the positions reversed.She said in a press meet "I am sure the Shiv sainiks will have no complaints after this"
Pramod Mutalik's new year resolution is simple and straightforward. Attack more girls in public. According to a source, the Pink chaddi campaign didn't live upto their expectations and the party seniors are complaining that many cadres haven't got even one pink chaddi yet while the more powerful and influential ones are keeping all the chaddis
Barack Obama's resolution is to not do or say something which will get him another Nobel prize this year. "I will strive my level best," says a press release from Washington D.C. quoting the US President, "but I cannot guarantee that the Nobel committee will not decide to confer me the Peace Prize again. They are nice people.Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. Oh, I digress"
Tiger Woods has a resolution too . But just as he was announcing it, he saw a blonde passing by and before they could catch him, he was gone.
Satyam's RamaLinga Raju has other plans. He has just watched Shawshank Redemption in jail and now is planning to reprise Andy Dufrense's character in real life, but in a much professional and polished way than digging a hole for 20 years. He has planned to manipulate the records in the jail so much that there is will be no evidence that he was ever in jail. And finally he'll make a dramatic escape, something like in this pic.In midst of all this, one man has made a silent resolution to himself. Or I wish he has. Hit a century in every match :D. Sachin Tendulkar : Switch to GODMODE!
Any other celebs whose resolutions you would wanna know? ;)
Happy New Year everyone! Let the FUN continue :)
Friday, December 25, 2009
Grounded!
I am grounded. Parents not at all happy with my regularly being out of town(dunno what their problem is :( ). The point now is for two consecutive long weekends,I will be at home(almost). So I thought I'll come with a proper plan to efficiently utilize the 6 days without simply goofing around on my PC reading reddit posts, stumbling etc and ending up getting bored. That's why this post. So without further ado, lets gets started. I will also be editing the post to update what I actually did that day (Big incentive)
Day 1(Dec 25) : Well, its a little more than 4 hours left for the day and I have no regrets. I cooked breakfast , saw a super cool movie (Avatar) today, slept a bit, cleaned up the house (prep for new year party at my place ;)) and now writing this blog which is very important too since its been some 50 days since I last posted! I'll go on a walk now and get a pirated novel. Looking for Godfather 2.
EDIT: I went out and got this book "Inspite of the Gods", with the tagline 'The Strange rise of Modern India'. Seems like a good read
Day 2 : A long pending activity, taking my bike LL exam. Seems like I have to muster all my will-power and fight off strong inertia to go to the RTO office (wondering why? Lets just say bad memories) but I WILL get it done this time. To the club at noon. In the evening, I'll just curl up with a book. I also have to sort out clothes for the next week (Believe me, I have never done this.EVER). Watch some movie
EDIT: Didn't I tell you me and the RTO office don't go well? :P I went there at 10:45 and the agent says after taking the cash from me "Long queue now. Not possible.Come on tuesday" I submitted the docs and came.Went to the club also and as usual, my sneeze fest started and my head was heavy for a long time after comnig out of water. Rottentomatoes has become one of my favourite sites. They have updates on movies releasing 2 years later,cool movie info,plus the latest trailers (See IronMan 2 & Clash of the Titans).So you know what I did instead of "curling up with a book". I tried watching 2012 & Lord of the rings (Animated, 1977)but both were real funny. I did wash my clothes though.
Day 3 : Its sunday already. Have to go to the club again, to the gym and swimming. No excuses. Study something worthwhile,and then more cleaning up the house. I am planning on another blog post too, guess it'll happen here.
EDIT: I made Palak rice for bf(it was good actually), then sat down to read the book I had got while waiting for John(He was supposed to come from mysore to stay over at my place and get his passport work done the next day). So..ahem..3rd day didnt go as planned :P. We went for a round of bike ride (majestic :D. Actually went for 3 idiots,but no tickets). Then came home and saw back-to-back disturbing movies(Paranormal activity & District 9).
And thanks for the response for this post. People have been reminding & inquiring me about the plan. Kinda amusing and heartening too :).Until next weekend...
Now I feel planning for the next week is to much for me . I'll try my best to stick to this plan. A new year you see, a new order :P
Day 4 ( Jan 1) : 31st is hectic with activity, so I guess I'll start the new year with a rest day. Ya and do Perl programming exercises (YES!YES!YES!) I'll meet up any friends who are free and ready to meet up
EDIT: It was a rest day (as planned :D) . Evening I was out with friends to the crowded chaat street, where we hogged junk food like there's no tomorrow. No Perl :(
Day 5 : Almost grounded, NEVER FULLY GROUNDED. Planning a bike trip to Yelagiri. I'm hoping it'll work out.
EDIT: Yay, went for a bike trip combined with a trek to Rangaswamy betta.There was nothing much to see there so half the time we just lazed on some rock and spoke nonsense . Evening again dinner out with friends. Point to self No more junk food and eating out for January
Day 6 : All Izz Well. Gotta catch 3 idots. I am allotting this to Sunday but it will happen sometime in these 3 days. I will be going to the club too (I have missed out on this for too many weekends off late. Trying to make up). Watch a couple of movies.
Hmm, lemme see scrolls up. This seems fine. Being at home doesn't seem that bad.I'll keep editing this post updating what I have actually done everyday. And no worries, the holiday season has just started for me wink wink
Day 1(Dec 25) : Well, its a little more than 4 hours left for the day and I have no regrets. I cooked breakfast , saw a super cool movie (Avatar) today, slept a bit, cleaned up the house (prep for new year party at my place ;)) and now writing this blog which is very important too since its been some 50 days since I last posted! I'll go on a walk now and get a pirated novel. Looking for Godfather 2.
EDIT: I went out and got this book "Inspite of the Gods", with the tagline 'The Strange rise of Modern India'. Seems like a good read
Day 2 : A long pending activity, taking my bike LL exam. Seems like I have to muster all my will-power and fight off strong inertia to go to the RTO office (wondering why? Lets just say bad memories) but I WILL get it done this time. To the club at noon. In the evening, I'll just curl up with a book. I also have to sort out clothes for the next week (Believe me, I have never done this.EVER). Watch some movie
EDIT: Didn't I tell you me and the RTO office don't go well? :P I went there at 10:45 and the agent says after taking the cash from me "Long queue now. Not possible.Come on tuesday" I submitted the docs and came.Went to the club also and as usual, my sneeze fest started and my head was heavy for a long time after comnig out of water. Rottentomatoes has become one of my favourite sites. They have updates on movies releasing 2 years later,cool movie info,plus the latest trailers (See IronMan 2 & Clash of the Titans).So you know what I did instead of "curling up with a book". I tried watching 2012 & Lord of the rings (Animated, 1977)but both were real funny. I did wash my clothes though.
Day 3 : Its sunday already. Have to go to the club again, to the gym and swimming. No excuses. Study something worthwhile,and then more cleaning up the house. I am planning on another blog post too, guess it'll happen here.
EDIT: I made Palak rice for bf(it was good actually), then sat down to read the book I had got while waiting for John(He was supposed to come from mysore to stay over at my place and get his passport work done the next day). So..ahem..3rd day didnt go as planned :P. We went for a round of bike ride (majestic :D. Actually went for 3 idiots,but no tickets). Then came home and saw back-to-back disturbing movies(Paranormal activity & District 9).
And thanks for the response for this post. People have been reminding & inquiring me about the plan. Kinda amusing and heartening too :).Until next weekend...
Now I feel planning for the next week is to much for me . I'll try my best to stick to this plan. A new year you see, a new order :P
Day 4 ( Jan 1) : 31st is hectic with activity, so I guess I'll start the new year with a rest day. Ya and do Perl programming exercises (YES!YES!YES!) I'll meet up any friends who are free and ready to meet up
EDIT: It was a rest day (as planned :D) . Evening I was out with friends to the crowded chaat street, where we hogged junk food like there's no tomorrow. No Perl :(
Day 5 : Almost grounded, NEVER FULLY GROUNDED. Planning a bike trip to Yelagiri. I'm hoping it'll work out.
EDIT: Yay, went for a bike trip combined with a trek to Rangaswamy betta.There was nothing much to see there so half the time we just lazed on some rock and spoke nonsense . Evening again dinner out with friends. Point to self No more junk food and eating out for January
Day 6 : All Izz Well. Gotta catch 3 idots. I am allotting this to Sunday but it will happen sometime in these 3 days. I will be going to the club too (I have missed out on this for too many weekends off late. Trying to make up). Watch a couple of movies.
Hmm, lemme see scrolls up. This seems fine. Being at home doesn't seem that bad.I'll keep editing this post updating what I have actually done everyday. And no worries, the holiday season has just started for me wink wink
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
The legend of Masala-X
I am pining.I am pining my dinners away.The sambar masala which mom packed (lets call it masala-X for easy readability) me for Diwali is nowhere to be seen. No ordinary powder this one. One look at it and you would be reminded of gunpowder. Bend down a little and smell it and the spicy flavor of it intoxicates . Just don't get your nose too close,for all you'll get is fits of sneezing and coughing. You have been warned.You might not convinced yet.Let me compare this to the popular MTR Sambar masala. The most efficient way of putting it is this :
That sums it up (I knew my calculus would be put to good use someday). Few of us might argue there is no way one can integrate MTR masala from 0 to e powered x to get some mom's sambar masala. If that's the case,you are cordially invited to a Sunday afternoon sambar-rice lunch to my place over which I will prove to you beyond doubt the above equation. Fine, we shall take a more real-life example for the present, say traffic in Hyderabad. Another mathematical equation comes handy again :
Masala-X : MTR's : : Hyderabad city traffic : Galli traffic in Ejipura
An inquisitive mind (probably one of those who had a problem with the integral)or a Bangalore loyalist would raise a question as to why Hyderabad was quoted and not Bangalore, although I daresay this matter is none to be proud of. I am afraid I will have digress further assuming that my intelligent reader is capable enough to keep track of the narrative.Lets take a simple case of a pedestrian crossing the road in Himayatnagar, a fairly upmarket locality in Hyderabad. Once you reach the middle of the road, 6 out of 10 times you find yourself dead straight in line with an adrenaline charged biker zooming at an inestimable speed, usually returning from a telugu movie at a theatre at RTC X-Roads where he would have seen the super hero (there are only superheroes in telugu movies) beat the crap out of the 50 people surrounding him in an epic climax. At that instant as you look into his eyes, you know you are done for. And at that very instant,your entire life will unfold in front of your eyes in a series of snapshots, rewinding fast from frame to frame. Then blank.Peace.….A deafening noise. The bike has zoomed past and you are standing like a dead trunk in the middle of the road,heart in your mouth You have been warned. Again.
Now that we have effectively described the credentials of this masala powder, I have to clarify one more thing. Granny will be stirring in her grave hearing me address the legendary Masala-X as mom's, for it was her patented recipe. As a kid, when I visited grandma's place for summer holidays, I would get down the auto and run straight to he kitchen shouting "Ajjjjji, masale haaki huli madidiii?"(Grandma,have you prepared the sambar adding the masala?) Grandma would walk to me at a slow pace, chuckling, peck me on my mouth (Why do grannys do that!?) and then open the container to proudly display the brownish-red sambar, its aroma filling the entire kitchen.And then we cousins would have the rice and sambar for dinner,with dollops of ghee to add, sometimes in the verandah by moonlight. My summer holidays were made of such memories :). Ajjis and Ajjas have gone, but their legacy remains.
So what now? I have lost all hopes of finding masala-X. And so the X-factor wil be missing in my dinner till I go home next time. Until then, I will just have to make do with the e^x times differentiated version from the MTRs.
Masala-X : MTR's : : Hyderabad city traffic : Galli traffic in Ejipura
An inquisitive mind (probably one of those who had a problem with the integral)or a Bangalore loyalist would raise a question as to why Hyderabad was quoted and not Bangalore, although I daresay this matter is none to be proud of. I am afraid I will have digress further assuming that my intelligent reader is capable enough to keep track of the narrative.Lets take a simple case of a pedestrian crossing the road in Himayatnagar, a fairly upmarket locality in Hyderabad. Once you reach the middle of the road, 6 out of 10 times you find yourself dead straight in line with an adrenaline charged biker zooming at an inestimable speed, usually returning from a telugu movie at a theatre at RTC X-Roads where he would have seen the super hero (there are only superheroes in telugu movies) beat the crap out of the 50 people surrounding him in an epic climax. At that instant as you look into his eyes, you know you are done for. And at that very instant,your entire life will unfold in front of your eyes in a series of snapshots, rewinding fast from frame to frame. Then blank.Peace.….A deafening noise. The bike has zoomed past and you are standing like a dead trunk in the middle of the road,heart in your mouth You have been warned. Again.
Now that we have effectively described the credentials of this masala powder, I have to clarify one more thing. Granny will be stirring in her grave hearing me address the legendary Masala-X as mom's, for it was her patented recipe. As a kid, when I visited grandma's place for summer holidays, I would get down the auto and run straight to he kitchen shouting "Ajjjjji, masale haaki huli madidiii?"(Grandma,have you prepared the sambar adding the masala?) Grandma would walk to me at a slow pace, chuckling, peck me on my mouth (Why do grannys do that!?) and then open the container to proudly display the brownish-red sambar, its aroma filling the entire kitchen.And then we cousins would have the rice and sambar for dinner,with dollops of ghee to add, sometimes in the verandah by moonlight. My summer holidays were made of such memories :). Ajjis and Ajjas have gone, but their legacy remains.
So what now? I have lost all hopes of finding masala-X. And so the X-factor wil be missing in my dinner till I go home next time. Until then, I will just have to make do with the e^x times differentiated version from the MTRs.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Things I want to do
I have been content off late.And happy. Given my enthusiasm for a variety of things, there are few chances of this contentment phase slipping into the indifference phase and then the rut phase (get it?), but I dont want to take chances. And I am serious about improvising myself. So I am penning this list here. Ah, I am being careful to mention these are things I 'want' to do, not things I 'will' do. Thats because some of these are realistic short term goals, long term goals and some mere wishes as of now. Positively, many of them should convert into my new year resolutions.
I want to:
For those who are looking, the I-am-not-going-to list :
Its my blog's birthday on Oct 24th! Precious words from the kid himself : I have to say I am quite happy how Mr.Chaotic has shaped me. I think I am growing up to be a cool,cool person. I have to admit though, that I am still a struggling blog .We need to work on this,dad. Advanced Thanks for all your wishes. Gifts wil be appreciated even more. Keep visiting :)
There, you heard the guy. Happy Birthday Blog. And many happy returns :) :)
I want to:
- Go on a long trip. No planning, no time frame, no destination in mind. I have a serious urge to do this alone. Something major has to happen to trigger this
- Be less rude to close friends.
- Get out of my comfort zone as often as possible. I take time to get out of my comfort zone.I've done better off late, but I want to really push it now.
- Speak to more people, even strangers. I want to think there are wonderful people around us and life can be more colorful :)
- Make my CS degree speak. Brush up on my rusty programming skills.
- Achieve 20 burpees. The prison workout!
- Improve my stock market gyaan and prediction skills. Make it a major source of income ;)
- Blog more. I am not sure what kind of reactions this will evoke, but I want to use it like a diary more often,writing to myself
- Inculcate discipline. I know this does not do justice to the title of the blog, but lets not worry too soon
- Learn whistling! How many more magic moments and great sequences will I let pass away while i just sit there while watching movies? I need to take a day and get this done with
For those who are looking, the I-am-not-going-to list :
- I-am-not-going-to stop watching anime
- I-am-not-going-to stop visiting reddit.com
- I-am-not-going-to be polite with my friends
- I am not going to keep my room spotless clean.. you will figure out the rest
Its my blog's birthday on Oct 24th! Precious words from the kid himself : I have to say I am quite happy how Mr.Chaotic has shaped me. I think I am growing up to be a cool,cool person. I have to admit though, that I am still a struggling blog .We need to work on this,dad. Advanced Thanks for all your wishes. Gifts wil be appreciated even more. Keep visiting :)
There, you heard the guy. Happy Birthday Blog. And many happy returns :) :)
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Small is BIG!
Who doesn't love Maggi? For most of us, Maggi is the favorite hungry-at-midnight snack, the rainy-evenings snack, too-hungry-to-cook snack, just-wanna-have-something-spicy snack and so on. I am yet to come across a person who says "I hate Maggi". And when I do, I would think twice before continuing the conversation :D. Anyways, the point I am trying to make is, few things around us seem like they are too simple and small to be bestowed with such popularity,yet definitely NOT overrated.
This is how I came to make this pointless list while trying to kill time during the 12-hour bus journey last week. (There was a return journey too. Expect more posts :P)
Andaz Apna Apna: This movie is now a cult classic. You just can't watch the movie enough times. And all your friends will agree. But I am sure no one associated with the movie would have thought the movie would garner such a huge fan following in years to come; more so when the movie was actually a flop when it was released(I know,such blasphemy!).
Horoscopes : Most(I cant get myself to say all) horoscopes are fake. Today's prediction for Leo maybe an exact copy-paste of yesterday's Taurus'. Everyone knows it.But it makes for great fun during coffee breaks or just comparing yours with your best friend's :). And on few hilarious days, you get lines like this : You will find the love of your life today. (And so)Your day will be filled with mental anxiety and tension
Cats: At a broad level, a Cat is just a domestic animal. Comes relatively low in the food cycle. Kids know it only because it helps them remember the letter 'C'. It does nothing, just whiles away most of its life sleeping,looks bored when awake and ignores you completely;let alone try to impress you, like your dog. But you can't deny cats are amazing creatures. The feline charm is indisputable.Its just the lineage you see.
Old DD presentations: Being born and brought up in a media-starved generation does this to you. You see the Ek-Anek Video and go into huge fits of nostalgia and tell all your friends about how wonderful it feels. You download/copy episodes of Byomkesh Bakshi or The Flop Show (remember Jaspal Bhatti?) and watch them religiously even though a 5-yr-old kid will tell you there are too many loopholes or way too many PJs. Nostalgia sure is a wonderful feeling :) (I was careful not to mention Mahabharat,Ramayan or Mile sur mera... here. They were meant to be huge)
Good morning : Things are getting a bit mushy,but I'll plough on. Such a simple phrase and from an age-old culture. Maybe as just a token expression to trigger a conversation or a well meant wish for someone close, the surprising fact is that even after centuries of usage, it does not sound cliched and hasn't got replaced with some modern form of expression. Hello got abridged to Hi,hey etc, wassup came into being but Good morning remains :)
The TV Remote :The TV was a path-breaking invention. Agreed. But the remote? May be when it was first introduced, most people would have frowned "at it as being useless and redundant. But now, the remote is as big, if not bigger than the TV itself. The remote controls you, not the other way round. Entire families go into fights over the remote control . The poor TV just sits in one corner waiting for its deserved attention while the little rectangular thing gets all the attention, thanks our larger-than-life egos. And to think that while the TV has taken vast strides in innovation since its invention, the remote remains the same. Ah, the wonders of modern technology!
Coffee: I am not a coffee person; and I know being a software professional , I'm an exception to the rule. I seriously don't understand why people go ga-ga over coffee. I mean, why the hell would anyone want to have a hot beverage on a hot summer day,that too at 11 AM? Beats me. I can't imagine a scene where the guy who invented coffee, had a first sip of it, and went "EUREKA! This thing is gonna be huge!" But easy to imagine for, say, an ice-cream or a pastry!
I hope this list did make some sense. Now try coming up with more such things and post here ;)
***
Turns out I have not been keeping check of my spending off late. To compensate, I have decided I will be a total kanjoos for some time. The agenda is no treats for myself or friends, absolutely no shopping, no birthday gifts, bargaining wherever possible and more. In short, I am going to be a total ass when it comes to money. Till November end that is. (3 days during Diwali are exempted though ;)) To make it formal, lets have a tag for this.
This is how I came to make this pointless list while trying to kill time during the 12-hour bus journey last week. (There was a return journey too. Expect more posts :P)
Andaz Apna Apna: This movie is now a cult classic. You just can't watch the movie enough times. And all your friends will agree. But I am sure no one associated with the movie would have thought the movie would garner such a huge fan following in years to come; more so when the movie was actually a flop when it was released(I know,such blasphemy!).
Horoscopes : Most(I cant get myself to say all) horoscopes are fake. Today's prediction for Leo maybe an exact copy-paste of yesterday's Taurus'. Everyone knows it.But it makes for great fun during coffee breaks or just comparing yours with your best friend's :). And on few hilarious days, you get lines like this : You will find the love of your life today. (And so)Your day will be filled with mental anxiety and tension
Cats: At a broad level, a Cat is just a domestic animal. Comes relatively low in the food cycle. Kids know it only because it helps them remember the letter 'C'. It does nothing, just whiles away most of its life sleeping,looks bored when awake and ignores you completely;let alone try to impress you, like your dog. But you can't deny cats are amazing creatures. The feline charm is indisputable.Its just the lineage you see.
Old DD presentations: Being born and brought up in a media-starved generation does this to you. You see the Ek-Anek Video and go into huge fits of nostalgia and tell all your friends about how wonderful it feels. You download/copy episodes of Byomkesh Bakshi or The Flop Show (remember Jaspal Bhatti?) and watch them religiously even though a 5-yr-old kid will tell you there are too many loopholes or way too many PJs. Nostalgia sure is a wonderful feeling :) (I was careful not to mention Mahabharat,Ramayan or Mile sur mera... here. They were meant to be huge)
Good morning : Things are getting a bit mushy,but I'll plough on. Such a simple phrase and from an age-old culture. Maybe as just a token expression to trigger a conversation or a well meant wish for someone close, the surprising fact is that even after centuries of usage, it does not sound cliched and hasn't got replaced with some modern form of expression. Hello got abridged to Hi,hey etc, wassup came into being but Good morning remains :)
The TV Remote :The TV was a path-breaking invention. Agreed. But the remote? May be when it was first introduced, most people would have frowned "at it as being useless and redundant. But now, the remote is as big, if not bigger than the TV itself. The remote controls you, not the other way round. Entire families go into fights over the remote control . The poor TV just sits in one corner waiting for its deserved attention while the little rectangular thing gets all the attention, thanks our larger-than-life egos. And to think that while the TV has taken vast strides in innovation since its invention, the remote remains the same. Ah, the wonders of modern technology!
Coffee: I am not a coffee person; and I know being a software professional , I'm an exception to the rule. I seriously don't understand why people go ga-ga over coffee. I mean, why the hell would anyone want to have a hot beverage on a hot summer day,that too at 11 AM? Beats me. I can't imagine a scene where the guy who invented coffee, had a first sip of it, and went "EUREKA! This thing is gonna be huge!" But easy to imagine for, say, an ice-cream or a pastry!
I hope this list did make some sense. Now try coming up with more such things and post here ;)
***
Turns out I have not been keeping check of my spending off late. To compensate, I have decided I will be a total kanjoos for some time. The agenda is no treats for myself or friends, absolutely no shopping, no birthday gifts, bargaining wherever possible and more. In short, I am going to be a total ass when it comes to money. Till November end that is. (3 days during Diwali are exempted though ;)) To make it formal, lets have a tag for this.
Monday, August 31, 2009
BJP: The Jas-not-want-ed situation
Last week I heard a couple of friends lamenting the pathetic state BJP is in now. It is true. The "party with a difference" has morphed into a "party with lot of differences". Lets analyze. Should we start with why Mr.Jaswant Singh, an ex- in the party, had a brainwave that he should write a book on Jinnah, or in the first place,write a book? Varied possibilities shoot out. Just to kill time, to whip up some juicy controversy to get himself publicity and popularity, or the more plausible wanting-to-project-himself-as-the-brand-new-liberal-and-secular-leader etc etc. Mr.Singh chuckles.Heh.Or gives an evil grin. Whatever his motive was, one can be almost sure it didn't involve him getting expelled from the party and finding himself saying this: "From the Hanuman of the party I have become the Raavan". Staying true to the party's ideology by picking characters from the Ramayana. Nicely done. But that is just the beginning...of the end.
Now, Mr.Singh takes the Ramayana ideology a tad too seriously and dons the role of Vibishana, letting out a few skeletons out of the BJP closet, one everyday. Few of you might object to comparing Singh to Raavan's noble sibling; point noted. Seizing the moment by its throat,another BJP biggie, Arun Shourie jumps to add non-iodized salt to BJP wounds. I was amused for one,that an elderly staunch Hindutva pro politician referencing Humpty Dumpty and Alice(in Blunderland). May be he is trying to strike a chord with Kindergarten & nursery going kids because Politics is a hot topic of discussion for the kids at that age when they are not crying their eyes out over a chocolate snatched by another bullying kid in class. Well, well, if we thought this was enough damage done for us to remember even till the next elections, few within the party did not want to take any chances. Spicy Avakkai pickle on the wounds. And the credit goes to RSS Chief Sudarshan (repeats what JS said earlier). Branching a bit, this Jinnah guy must have been some dude to be able to influence people so long after he's gone. TOI ran an article on last Sunday referring him as He-who-must-not-be-named or The Dark Lord (from HP series). Touche :P
Thus, skeletons kept rolling out of the closet. Actually, this might have been a sort of theme this month at Delhi. India no match for China,says Navy chief , Pokhran 2 was a fizzle make me say this. Hopefully good sense will prevail soon and wont get to hear things like,hmmm, Lalu was offered DDLJ before ShahRukh,says Rabri or T-Rex never existed (I don't know about others, but this would be a major trauma for me :D)
The big question is, with the biggest opposition party in the parliament left utterly toothless, how much will it hurt the nation. It will considerably. Sonia Gandhi and Mr.PM must be trying hard to stifle their giggles seeing the goings on with their opponents, BJP and the Left . BJP needs to come out of the ridiculous illusion that the party's standpoint on Jinnah is going to affect its image or the votes. It needs to come in sync with the current generation and understand that its a worthless endeavor to dig into the past and this passion is better reserved for addressing the issues faced by India,for our future; for keeping the ruling party on its toes and seeing to it that the promises made are delivered. The sooner it happens, the better for the party and more importantly, for the country.
Now, Mr.Singh takes the Ramayana ideology a tad too seriously and dons the role of Vibishana, letting out a few skeletons out of the BJP closet, one everyday. Few of you might object to comparing Singh to Raavan's noble sibling; point noted. Seizing the moment by its throat,another BJP biggie, Arun Shourie jumps to add non-iodized salt to BJP wounds. I was amused for one,that an elderly staunch Hindutva pro politician referencing Humpty Dumpty and Alice(in Blunderland). May be he is trying to strike a chord with Kindergarten & nursery going kids because Politics is a hot topic of discussion for the kids at that age when they are not crying their eyes out over a chocolate snatched by another bullying kid in class. Well, well, if we thought this was enough damage done for us to remember even till the next elections, few within the party did not want to take any chances. Spicy Avakkai pickle on the wounds. And the credit goes to RSS Chief Sudarshan (repeats what JS said earlier). Branching a bit, this Jinnah guy must have been some dude to be able to influence people so long after he's gone. TOI ran an article on last Sunday referring him as He-who-must-not-be-named or The Dark Lord (from HP series). Touche :P
Thus, skeletons kept rolling out of the closet. Actually, this might have been a sort of theme this month at Delhi. India no match for China,says Navy chief , Pokhran 2 was a fizzle make me say this. Hopefully good sense will prevail soon and wont get to hear things like,hmmm, Lalu was offered DDLJ before ShahRukh,says Rabri or T-Rex never existed (I don't know about others, but this would be a major trauma for me :D)
The big question is, with the biggest opposition party in the parliament left utterly toothless, how much will it hurt the nation. It will considerably. Sonia Gandhi and Mr.PM must be trying hard to stifle their giggles seeing the goings on with their opponents, BJP and the Left . BJP needs to come out of the ridiculous illusion that the party's standpoint on Jinnah is going to affect its image or the votes. It needs to come in sync with the current generation and understand that its a worthless endeavor to dig into the past and this passion is better reserved for addressing the issues faced by India,for our future; for keeping the ruling party on its toes and seeing to it that the promises made are delivered. The sooner it happens, the better for the party and more importantly, for the country.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Mish-Mash Post
The title says it all. Years later, I would like my blog to remind me nostalgically(???) of my life from time to time. So once in a while,such posts will happen (Not because I couldn't think of anything else to write,okay?). Those who already know what's gonna come can directly go to the comments section ;)
Lets start with rants. My most popular rant since last week: My bike has got delayed by atleast 6 weeks :(. I've told everyone I know that I am getting a bike. 2 weeks later there is no bike to show!!! Those idiots informed me of the delay after the payment X(. But how typical of me! This time I didn't wanna hear people say "Always hype and no action" (I knew it !!!) but this is going the same way.Sigh! Speaking of people reminds me of another rant of mine these days. Suddenly everyone has gotten busy. I have to mention The HP fiasco here so that its not forgotten :P. No groups to hang out with,to go to the movies regularly or most importantly,for the trips. What irritates me is that I feel I am the only one who is free,who is available all the time. I have given this a thought and have come with a plan of action. More of this in days to come. If Mom hears me cribbing though, she already has a different action plan ready. I don't need to elaborate.
Dieting : People(Friends at office,particularly) have got bugged hearing this from me day in day out. I checked my weight today. 81.1 kg (with clothes on,mind you). FYI,I've reduced. I have to get to 78, and pretty soon at that. As Naruto would say,"Yosha!" Oh, I've started watching another anime, Getbackers (I can hear the exasperated sighs). Its only 49 episodes; will be finished quickly ;)
Cooking at home is going on well. I had made Bisi Bele Bhath last last week,which turned out yummy and pongal last week, which was not so yummy. I'll try something exotic next. Any suggestions? :D
Coming to movies, the good ones recently: Socha Na Tha (Abhay Deol's debut and Imtiaz Ali's directorial debut), The Reader,12 monkeys. I thought The Hangover was overhyped. And saw Magadheera at this popular single screen theatre where one man stands at the ticket counter and shooes people away with a stick ("block alli sigatte hogappa") and the theatre manager stands authoritatively and directs people to black tickets. And yeah, Kaminey is here and the reviews are very very positive.
Reading The Three Musketeers and The Kite Runner. Totally contrasting reads when it comes to writing style and narration.
Was listening to 'Teredide mane O baa atithi' yesterday. The fact that I can appreciate how really beautiful this song is made me feel lucky,proud and happy to be born as an Indian. And this is just one example of the beautiful things around you. Happy Independence day :)
I can't think of much else. And, here : C&H greatest .This should make up for wasting your time on this useless post.
Finally,thanks to everyone who made my Birthday special last week. Arigato :)
Lets start with rants. My most popular rant since last week: My bike has got delayed by atleast 6 weeks :(. I've told everyone I know that I am getting a bike. 2 weeks later there is no bike to show!!! Those idiots informed me of the delay after the payment X(. But how typical of me! This time I didn't wanna hear people say "Always hype and no action" (I knew it !!!) but this is going the same way.Sigh! Speaking of people reminds me of another rant of mine these days. Suddenly everyone has gotten busy. I have to mention The HP fiasco here so that its not forgotten :P. No groups to hang out with,to go to the movies regularly or most importantly,for the trips. What irritates me is that I feel I am the only one who is free,who is available all the time. I have given this a thought and have come with a plan of action. More of this in days to come. If Mom hears me cribbing though, she already has a different action plan ready. I don't need to elaborate.
Dieting : People(Friends at office,particularly) have got bugged hearing this from me day in day out. I checked my weight today. 81.1 kg (with clothes on,mind you). FYI,I've reduced. I have to get to 78, and pretty soon at that. As Naruto would say,"Yosha!" Oh, I've started watching another anime, Getbackers (I can hear the exasperated sighs). Its only 49 episodes; will be finished quickly ;)
Cooking at home is going on well. I had made Bisi Bele Bhath last last week,which turned out yummy and pongal last week, which was not so yummy. I'll try something exotic next. Any suggestions? :D
Coming to movies, the good ones recently: Socha Na Tha (Abhay Deol's debut and Imtiaz Ali's directorial debut), The Reader,12 monkeys. I thought The Hangover was overhyped. And saw Magadheera at this popular single screen theatre where one man stands at the ticket counter and shooes people away with a stick ("block alli sigatte hogappa") and the theatre manager stands authoritatively and directs people to black tickets. And yeah, Kaminey is here and the reviews are very very positive.
Reading The Three Musketeers and The Kite Runner. Totally contrasting reads when it comes to writing style and narration.
Was listening to 'Teredide mane O baa atithi' yesterday. The fact that I can appreciate how really beautiful this song is made me feel lucky,proud and happy to be born as an Indian. And this is just one example of the beautiful things around you. Happy Independence day :)
I can't think of much else. And, here : C&H greatest .This should make up for wasting your time on this useless post.
Finally,thanks to everyone who made my Birthday special last week. Arigato :)
Monday, July 20, 2009
Sleepless in Ejipura
Its been a week now. I have been having sleepless early mornings because of a Rooster. Er... don't get me wrong here. A Rooster-crowing,to be precise.Yessiree, I hear early morning cock-crowing,here,in Bangalore.Opposite house to mine. Nostalgic,u say? Well,it has been a real pain in the arse to me(And you can guess the magnitude of my plight if I am using expletives without **). The first time it happened, I was rudely awakened wondering who is the moron playing Himesh songs at 5 in the morning! I know you can't call a cock-crowing nasal by any stretch of imagination. Actually, I think its as throaty as it can get. Still, one thing very much common between the two (Mr.Rooster & Himesh, if we have meandered too much) is the stress on the last syllable (Ooooooooooooooo!). Oh, just realized there's more. The cap!!! Anyways, Himesh Bhai has been lying low for a while now & there might be a probability this piece might act as a catalyst to wake him up from his reverie(Yeah,right :P). I shall not digress further.
So,where were we? Ah,now Mr.Rooster is as persistent as,say,my mom when she bugs me to get the tiffin box in which she packed my dinner on the journey back from HYD to Bangalore("It'll be nice if you can find the spoon too"). I needed to take urgent measures for the problem. Started listening to 'Restful Sleep'(audiobook) by Deepak Chopra. Such a waste. The guy talks only about Ayurveda,the body forms vata,pitta,bata (:D) or something to that effect. Never does he mention a certain Rooster and what needs to be done .Not even a word.For now,I have resigned to my fate. Sleep seems as distant and as impossible as an Akki movie winning the Oscar. Since we all know ultimately what fate awaits the cock (:(), I cannot be held guilty for wishing my opposite door gentlemen sing "Tandoori 'chicken' nights" (hey! Himesh song!) sooner than late
r. If its of any solace to anyone, I'll say this: RIP,Mr.Rooster.
Here is a pic, taken from the balcony-like area beyond the front door(I should've taken another pic to show you the guys the relative location. This needed some zooming).
As you can see, there's a Ms.Hen too, in the background. I am 100% sure it is also involved in contributing to my misery. Only, the MCP that I am, Mr.Rooster grabbed 'meat'ier part ;)
P.S: Ejipura is where I reside
P.P.S: I like some of HR songs,actually
P.P.P.S : Gaara is back in Naruto manga!!! :))
So,where were we? Ah,now Mr.Rooster is as persistent as,say,my mom when she bugs me to get the tiffin box in which she packed my dinner on the journey back from HYD to Bangalore("It'll be nice if you can find the spoon too"). I needed to take urgent measures for the problem. Started listening to 'Restful Sleep'(audiobook) by Deepak Chopra. Such a waste. The guy talks only about Ayurveda,the body forms vata,pitta,bata (:D) or something to that effect. Never does he mention a certain Rooster and what needs to be done .Not even a word.For now,I have resigned to my fate. Sleep seems as distant and as impossible as an Akki movie winning the Oscar. Since we all know ultimately what fate awaits the cock (:(), I cannot be held guilty for wishing my opposite door gentlemen sing "Tandoori 'chicken' nights" (hey! Himesh song!) sooner than late
r. If its of any solace to anyone, I'll say this: RIP,Mr.Rooster.Here is a pic, taken from the balcony-like area beyond the front door(I should've taken another pic to show you the guys the relative location. This needed some zooming).
As you can see, there's a Ms.Hen too, in the background. I am 100% sure it is also involved in contributing to my misery. Only, the MCP that I am, Mr.Rooster grabbed 'meat'ier part ;)
P.S: Ejipura is where I reside
P.P.S: I like some of HR songs,actually
P.P.P.S : Gaara is back in Naruto manga!!! :))
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Back to the movies!!!
Saw Angels & Demons last Sunday. A movie at the theaters after a long hiatus ( >3 months). The movie in itself, turned out to be pretty average. Langdon and Ms.Vetra keep running frantically all around Rome while discussing intelligently about Bernini's art and the other clues. That's it for most of the movie. Going on common sense, such movies are supposed to have more action sequences or something visually appealing than the books they are adapted from. Surprisingly, the makers of this movie thought otherwise. A suspense thriller sans the action. Two positive points : One,AnD is way better than DaViC, but that isnt saying much,right? Two, Beautiful Rome and its architecture :) Anyways, I hope Tom Hanks will now go back to playing those delightful characters like we've seen him doing all these years.
But the big news is....its a treat for the movie buffs in the coming months! Lots of biggies lined up for India Release. Terminator Salvation, X-MEN Origins: Wolverine (actually both movies aren't exactly setting the US box office on fire), Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs & Star Trek. I have almost zilch knowledge about the Star Trek series but the movie has got such great response (all time #88 in IMDB as of today & 95% on the tomatometer) I have to watch it after a
ll. There's also Up (Looks like The dudes at Pixar have got an Oscar Winner yet again ) and Tranformers 2 . Then,there's the biggest of them all : Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince . The movie has taken long in the making and it better be darn good. Phew, still quite a few movies left; but I'll stop this here :P
Things don't seem quite rosy on the Bollywood front what with the strike n all. Serves them both right: Producers, for giving us crappy movies most of the time and the multiplex owners for their exhorbitant prices :P. One movie which seems interesting is Vishal Bharadwaj's Kaminey (the title sounds cool too :D)
Enjoy the pop-corn guys ;)
"Once Again I must ask too much of you,Harry..."
P.S: Morning show balcony ticket at Rex is just 60 bucks! Even on weekends!!!
But the big news is....its a treat for the movie buffs in the coming months! Lots of biggies lined up for India Release. Terminator Salvation, X-MEN Origins: Wolverine (actually both movies aren't exactly setting the US box office on fire), Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs & Star Trek. I have almost zilch knowledge about the Star Trek series but the movie has got such great response (all time #88 in IMDB as of today & 95% on the tomatometer) I have to watch it after a
ll. There's also Up (Looks like The dudes at Pixar have got an Oscar Winner yet again ) and Tranformers 2 . Then,there's the biggest of them all : Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince . The movie has taken long in the making and it better be darn good. Phew, still quite a few movies left; but I'll stop this here :PThings don't seem quite rosy on the Bollywood front what with the strike n all. Serves them both right: Producers, for giving us crappy movies most of the time and the multiplex owners for their exhorbitant prices :P. One movie which seems interesting is Vishal Bharadwaj's Kaminey (the title sounds cool too :D)
Enjoy the pop-corn guys ;)
"Once Again I must ask too much of you,Harry..."
P.S: Morning show balcony ticket at Rex is just 60 bucks! Even on weekends!!!
Monday, May 25, 2009
The 'Amazing' Swayamwar
Move over Elections,move over IPL, the biggest event the year is here - Rakhi Ka Swayamwar. Rakhi Sawant(RS) has confirmed in a recent interview a strong speculation which was doing rounds - Lalit Modi & the EC had requested Rakhi to postpone the Swayamwar till after the elections and the IPL are over. Modi actually made a deal with Rakhi that he will send some cricketers to the show if she postpones it till the IPL is over. I wonder why EC hasn't issued as public thanks to Rakhi because if not for her , the vote percentage would've been much lower than the measly number now.
Anyways, now that everything is settled, the Swayamwar is all set to commence. And I, much like the Fake IPL Player have some inside information on the show (Fake Rakhi suitor? No I wouldn't go as far to call myself that :P)Lets get to the point now. I heard SRK has sent his entire team,expenses included, to the show as a 'reward' for their achieve-the-impossible performance in IPL2. Last heard, some Gang-wala-Dada was in a fit of rage saying he's married and elderly people should be respected etc etc. He was packed off nevertheless. Ishant Sharma was excited (like)a child and has conveniently forgotten the promise he made to mom that he would return home "Ganga jaisa pavitrr".
Rakhi has personally invited some eligible bachelors to improve the 'glamour quotient' of the show. Of course Salman would be there(No reason. You dare question Salman Khan? Not even on a blog!). I have heard even Aamir would be there as he is planning to cast Parthiv Patel (yeah,he's there too) for TZP-2. Sreesanth has been invited simply because when it comes to melodramatic performances in real life, he's only next to the woman herself. Bhajji has been specifically invited to inspire(read slap) Sree and make him bring forth his melodramatic side. Tushaar Kapoor and Harman Baweja invited themselves (C'mon guys, how many months can one spend on a playtation at home?)
About the format of the show,well, here's info on that too. Since Rakhi has stated she likes strong muscular men, there will be a do-or-die fight round. Of course, if its Ishant vs Salman, it will be "do" for one and "die" for the other. Bhajji vs Sree should be fun to watch what with all the slapping and the crying. And with all this drama going on around, can the original drama queen stay behind? Its her Swayamwar after all! I can imagine her saying "Chalo chalo, ab sab log laine mein khadhe ho jao aur ek ek karke mujhe woo karo.... Mujhse shaadi karna hai ki nai, chalo mera achcha bachcha, you come woo to me"
Well, looks like I have revealed a bit too much guys. Anything more, and the NDTV bosses have threatened that it'll be shut-shop for this blog. Ah! Like I'll let them wrench away my freedom of expression... Ah! like my readers will let them (I can sees the :Ps) . Also whats the fun if the entire storyline of a high-on-adrenaline suspense thriller is revealed beforehand?. Of course, I wont be watching it coz its a drama whose script I already know..... Muuhaaahhhaaa (Love the mytho-demon laugh) :D
Anyways, now that everything is settled, the Swayamwar is all set to commence. And I, much like the Fake IPL Player have some inside information on the show (Fake Rakhi suitor? No I wouldn't go as far to call myself that :P)Lets get to the point now. I heard SRK has sent his entire team,expenses included, to the show as a 'reward' for their achieve-the-impossible performance in IPL2. Last heard, some Gang-wala-Dada was in a fit of rage saying he's married and elderly people should be respected etc etc. He was packed off nevertheless. Ishant Sharma was excited (like)a child and has conveniently forgotten the promise he made to mom that he would return home "Ganga jaisa pavitrr".
Rakhi has personally invited some eligible bachelors to improve the 'glamour quotient' of the show. Of course Salman would be there(No reason. You dare question Salman Khan? Not even on a blog!). I have heard even Aamir would be there as he is planning to cast Parthiv Patel (yeah,he's there too) for TZP-2. Sreesanth has been invited simply because when it comes to melodramatic performances in real life, he's only next to the woman herself. Bhajji has been specifically invited to inspire(read slap) Sree and make him bring forth his melodramatic side. Tushaar Kapoor and Harman Baweja invited themselves (C'mon guys, how many months can one spend on a playtation at home?)
About the format of the show,well, here's info on that too. Since Rakhi has stated she likes strong muscular men, there will be a do-or-die fight round. Of course, if its Ishant vs Salman, it will be "do" for one and "die" for the other. Bhajji vs Sree should be fun to watch what with all the slapping and the crying. And with all this drama going on around, can the original drama queen stay behind? Its her Swayamwar after all! I can imagine her saying "Chalo chalo, ab sab log laine mein khadhe ho jao aur ek ek karke mujhe woo karo.... Mujhse shaadi karna hai ki nai, chalo mera achcha bachcha, you come woo to me"
Well, looks like I have revealed a bit too much guys. Anything more, and the NDTV bosses have threatened that it'll be shut-shop for this blog. Ah! Like I'll let them wrench away my freedom of expression... Ah! like my readers will let them (I can sees the :Ps) . Also whats the fun if the entire storyline of a high-on-adrenaline suspense thriller is revealed beforehand?. Of course, I wont be watching it coz its a drama whose script I already know..... Muuhaaahhhaaa (Love the mytho-demon laugh) :D
Monday, May 11, 2009
Zangetsu - The Awakening
I have gone around trumpeting for long enough that I am gonna get a new PC now. Damn! One day I shall do something which will make people react as if struck by a lightning. Last few weeks were terrible. My old precious PC so doggedly brought itself down part-by-part that it was palpable the poor thing was finally fed up of my tantrums. So I made a sad face and decided to replace it(grinning wide inwardly). And for everyone who has expressed utter dismay about me getting a desktop instead of a 'lappie', for the millionth time "Desktops rock!Period".
Me and Krishna (it was kinda surprising to see he himself offering to accompany me. PC buying can be a real pain, esp if you are not the one buying it!) reached SP road around 11.SP road as usual was delightfully vibrant,colorful and....CHAOTIC :D.A computer lover's haven. We first headed to Ankit computers and next to hitherto unknown World Computech('Best prices' written below) where Krish said he regularly visits. This guy had zilch knowledge on processors and motherboards but by then I had already finalised what to buy based on the input from guy at Ankit computers ;) And 'World Computech' prices were best indeed! So decided to buy it here :)
Sure the prices were OK but there's no wholesome feel of buying something at SP road if you miss one aspect- haggling. First for each of the parts and then on the overall price :D (I believe I am better at bargaining than most people, a trait I acquired from dad ;)). Finally both parties reached mutual agreement .Krishna said he has to go somewhere else. His search for pirated DVDs nearby had gone in vain :). My PC was brought to life in a service center in some dingy,shady-looking alley filled with suspicious faces. By this time, Vini (my roomie) had arrived in SP road looking for his laptop fan (The fan which rotates :D . And who says lappies need no maintenance :P). Finally I couldn't help laughing at myself for haggling for tens with autowallahs after just blowing up thousands :D.
Once I got home and assembled my PC and tried to switch it on,it didn't. Of course it wouldn't. It was my system after all ; if things went so smoothly with me, that would be ironic in an eerie way. A quick check revealed the SMPS has gone bust.Only a teenie-weenie bit of frustration :). Poor Vini had to drive me all the way and back. Took the whole cabinet along,just in case, and got the thing replaced. The day finally ended with my PC gloriously switching on and we watched an episode of Naruto on the big screen! :D
It does not get over so soon, right? I had to copy the contents of old hard disk to the new one. After discussing various alternatives, we figured the easiest method would be to switch on the old CPU (with no monitor,no keyboard,no mouse...only the CPU :D) and connect it to the LAN and then access the old HDD from there. The copying went quite smoothly with only two power cuts in between :P. Zangetsu has fully awakened now in all its glory, except.....except the voice is echoing :P. Gottu replace the speakers too,I guess. For now, I am all happy :) :)
And just for the record, Zangetsu :
Me and Krishna (it was kinda surprising to see he himself offering to accompany me. PC buying can be a real pain, esp if you are not the one buying it!) reached SP road around 11.SP road as usual was delightfully vibrant,colorful and....CHAOTIC :D.A computer lover's haven. We first headed to Ankit computers and next to hitherto unknown World Computech('Best prices' written below) where Krish said he regularly visits. This guy had zilch knowledge on processors and motherboards but by then I had already finalised what to buy based on the input from guy at Ankit computers ;) And 'World Computech' prices were best indeed! So decided to buy it here :)
Sure the prices were OK but there's no wholesome feel of buying something at SP road if you miss one aspect- haggling. First for each of the parts and then on the overall price :D (I believe I am better at bargaining than most people, a trait I acquired from dad ;)). Finally both parties reached mutual agreement .Krishna said he has to go somewhere else. His search for pirated DVDs nearby had gone in vain :). My PC was brought to life in a service center in some dingy,shady-looking alley filled with suspicious faces. By this time, Vini (my roomie) had arrived in SP road looking for his laptop fan (The fan which rotates :D . And who says lappies need no maintenance :P). Finally I couldn't help laughing at myself for haggling for tens with autowallahs after just blowing up thousands :D.
Once I got home and assembled my PC and tried to switch it on,it didn't. Of course it wouldn't. It was my system after all ; if things went so smoothly with me, that would be ironic in an eerie way. A quick check revealed the SMPS has gone bust.Only a teenie-weenie bit of frustration :). Poor Vini had to drive me all the way and back. Took the whole cabinet along,just in case, and got the thing replaced. The day finally ended with my PC gloriously switching on and we watched an episode of Naruto on the big screen! :D
It does not get over so soon, right? I had to copy the contents of old hard disk to the new one. After discussing various alternatives, we figured the easiest method would be to switch on the old CPU (with no monitor,no keyboard,no mouse...only the CPU :D) and connect it to the LAN and then access the old HDD from there. The copying went quite smoothly with only two power cuts in between :P. Zangetsu has fully awakened now in all its glory, except.....except the voice is echoing :P. Gottu replace the speakers too,I guess. For now, I am all happy :) :)
And just for the record, Zangetsu :
- Samsung 22" TFT LCD
- 320 GB SATA2 HDD
- 2GB RAM
- AMD Dual core 7750+2.7Ghz
- Asus M3A78-EM with 256MB nVidia Chipset
- Creative Inspire 2.1 Speakers
- A brand new UPS too!
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
My Bollywood Top 10!
I must say this post was due for a long time! I admit the products that are churned out from Bollywood can't be call intellectual stuff exactly and many would say there are better ways of killing time. All said and done, I'm still a Bollywood fan and hope that the song-dance sequences,the cheesiness and all other things that are so part of our movies remain so, for years and years to come. All we ask is an iota of logic....
Well then,to the topic, I would not so much say all my favourite movies are gems,but I guess we can safely say they are among the few very entertaining & watchable ones. Now lets start, DrumRoll Please.....
(this post may get a lil lengthy. Feel free to skip the boring parts.I'm afraid there are none)
10.Guide : This movie is the only one in this list earlier than the 90's. I have seen this movie only once years ago, and the images are still stuck in my mind. The inspirational theme of the movie, 'evergreen' Dev Anand's earnest performance and super melodious songs are the highlights. Gottu watch it again.
9.Andaaz Apna Apna : Arguably,the best comedy of our times. The humour was pedestrian. Utterly slapstick. The brilliance of it was that it was all intentional. So brilliant the audience then could not appreciate it and the movie actually flopped ;). Has anyone met any person who doesn't like this movie? :D
"Mein hoon Crime Master Gogo, aankhen nikaal ke gotiya kheloonga!"
"Suno, suno duniya ke logon! Sabse bada hai Mr. Gogo!" ......................... LOLz
8.Dil Chahta Hai : I guess lot of people would be irate DCH is so low on the list . If Farhan Akhtar would have made this movie even in 2050, he would
7.Lagaan : Any guesses on the biggest highlight of the movie??? Its the pre-release promotion, in which the 'Genius' Khan (debuting as producer) didn't let the masses have an iota of hint what this movie was all about. And when the movie released, people came to know the movie had a full length cricket match in it! And what helluva entertainment it was! Bhuvan all the way! :D
6.Pardes: I'll admit this movie is in this list because of my SRK bias. But I assure you,this movie has one of Shah Rukh Khan's finest performances (Seriously, no hamming, no making monkey faces :D). It has some great Bollywood-sque dramatic sequences and of course you'll remember the mind-blowing music score. Watch this movie and you'll know Mr.Ghai is(was?) called the Showman of Bollywood. Suggestion :Just ignore the America bashing (or enjoy it ;))
The Top 5 now!
5.Taare Zameen Par : Aamir Khan the director, debuts and how! Awesome,awesome movie. Sensitive
and intelligent filmmaking as never seen in Bollywood before.This movie has more 'goosebumps' sequences (you know?) than any movie I've seen in a very long time. And to top that with commercial success! Now that's genius. I have seen this movie only once, so as of now its at number 5.
(Ponder: I guess Aamir knew this movie is gonna rock. Maybe thats why he didn't spend much on the pre-release promotion,unlike himself. People weren't very interested before it released)
4.Ghulam : Its kinda sad people only remember Ghulam for 'Aati Kya Khandala'. The most inspirational hindi movie ever, IMHO. The movie had a great story and screenplay and a mind-blowing performance from Aamir Khan. Never got bored watching this movie! Totally recommended!
3.Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa: SRK has been awarded Filmfare Critics' Choice Best Actor Award only twice until now. The first one was for this gem of a movie (and next Mohabbatein). Another very under-rated movie. Shah Rukh's realistic, adorable portrayal of the lead character Sunil with all his vulnerability,innocence and even grey shades instantly makes you identify with the character and vouch for him . King Khan through and through! If you w
atched this movie when you were a kid and have forgotten it, I recommend you watch this one again :)
2.Kal Ho Na Ho: Another path-breaking movie , for all the gay jokes and making KantaBen a household name :D . Sheer entertainment value, SRK-Saif-Preity Chemistry,the title song,the then-innovative camerawork, dollops of emotions etc etc. make this movie such a delightful watch!
Now to The Numero Uno, the Baap Of All Entertainers, my all-time fav :)
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
1. Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge(DDLJ):
'Raj agar yeh ladki tujhse pyaar karti hain to yeh tujhe palat ke dekhegi'
(Raj whispers... And so do the entire audience in the movie hall) 'Palat! Palat!'
And then Simran palats with a smile....
This sequnce is just one of the several magical moments that make this movie. Cinematic Magic at its amazing best! Enough can't be said about this movie. Or too much has already been said. SRK-Kajol's crackling chemistry, the great-Indian-wedding sequences which were a craze then, the snowy Swiss Alps in the first half to the lush green Punjab in the second half, the NRI factor, the songs etc etc.. Apparently nothing went wrong for this movie when it comes to entertainment value. I shall refrain from saying its a once-in-a-lifetime movie ;)
Enjoy!!!
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_u5d_o7c4NI76oRgtZ98yaBRhet_Xj4wuLaCbzMoR9uZds0K3Wr9BgUiDeVM1NK57WpD5i4oH6qEUyOf1cxtt5AjtXwgAH7VCeQFswopwzjsYsR8Mh1iaUkLPygjqrsVKi77zxKgl5yQVd-39Ksng=s0-d)
Well then,to the topic, I would not so much say all my favourite movies are gems,but I guess we can safely say they are among the few very entertaining & watchable ones. Now lets start, DrumRoll Please.....
(this post may get a lil lengthy. Feel free to skip the boring parts.I'm afraid there are none)
10.Guide : This movie is the only one in this list earlier than the 90's. I have seen this movie only once years ago, and the images are still stuck in my mind. The inspirational theme of the movie, 'evergreen' Dev Anand's earnest performance and super melodious songs are the highlights. Gottu watch it again.
9.Andaaz Apna Apna : Arguably,the best comedy of our times. The humour was pedestrian. Utterly slapstick. The brilliance of it was that it was all intentional. So brilliant the audience then could not appreciate it and the movie actually flopped ;). Has anyone met any person who doesn't like this movie? :D
"Mein hoon Crime Master Gogo, aankhen nikaal ke gotiya kheloonga!"
"Suno, suno duniya ke logon! Sabse bada hai Mr. Gogo!" ......................... LOLz
8.Dil Chahta Hai : I guess lot of people would be irate DCH is so low on the list . If Farhan Akhtar would have made this movie even in 2050, he would
7.Lagaan : Any guesses on the biggest highlight of the movie??? Its the pre-release promotion, in which the 'Genius' Khan (debuting as producer) didn't let the masses have an iota of hint what this movie was all about. And when the movie released, people came to know the movie had a full length cricket match in it! And what helluva entertainment it was! Bhuvan all the way! :D
6.Pardes: I'll admit this movie is in this list because of my SRK bias. But I assure you,this movie has one of Shah Rukh Khan's finest performances (Seriously, no hamming, no making monkey faces :D). It has some great Bollywood-sque dramatic sequences and of course you'll remember the mind-blowing music score. Watch this movie and you'll know Mr.Ghai is(was?) called the Showman of Bollywood. Suggestion :Just ignore the America bashing (or enjoy it ;))
The Top 5 now!
5.Taare Zameen Par : Aamir Khan the director, debuts and how! Awesome,awesome movie. Sensitive
and intelligent filmmaking as never seen in Bollywood before.This movie has more 'goosebumps' sequences (you know?) than any movie I've seen in a very long time. And to top that with commercial success! Now that's genius. I have seen this movie only once, so as of now its at number 5.(Ponder: I guess Aamir knew this movie is gonna rock. Maybe thats why he didn't spend much on the pre-release promotion,unlike himself. People weren't very interested before it released)
4.Ghulam : Its kinda sad people only remember Ghulam for 'Aati Kya Khandala'. The most inspirational hindi movie ever, IMHO. The movie had a great story and screenplay and a mind-blowing performance from Aamir Khan. Never got bored watching this movie! Totally recommended!
3.Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa: SRK has been awarded Filmfare Critics' Choice Best Actor Award only twice until now. The first one was for this gem of a movie (and next Mohabbatein). Another very under-rated movie. Shah Rukh's realistic, adorable portrayal of the lead character Sunil with all his vulnerability,innocence and even grey shades instantly makes you identify with the character and vouch for him . King Khan through and through! If you w
atched this movie when you were a kid and have forgotten it, I recommend you watch this one again :)2.Kal Ho Na Ho: Another path-breaking movie , for all the gay jokes and making KantaBen a household name :D . Sheer entertainment value, SRK-Saif-Preity Chemistry,the title song,the then-innovative camerawork, dollops of emotions etc etc. make this movie such a delightful watch!
Now to The Numero Uno, the Baap Of All Entertainers, my all-time fav :)
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
1. Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge(DDLJ):
'Raj agar yeh ladki tujhse pyaar karti hain to yeh tujhe palat ke dekhegi'
(Raj whispers... And so do the entire audience in the movie hall) 'Palat! Palat!'
And then Simran palats with a smile....
This sequnce is just one of the several magical moments that make this movie. Cinematic Magic at its amazing best! Enough can't be said about this movie. Or too much has already been said. SRK-Kajol's crackling chemistry, the great-Indian-wedding sequences which were a craze then, the snowy Swiss Alps in the first half to the lush green Punjab in the second half, the NRI factor, the songs etc etc.. Apparently nothing went wrong for this movie when it comes to entertainment value. I shall refrain from saying its a once-in-a-lifetime movie ;)
Enjoy!!!
Friday, March 13, 2009
A 'fly-catching' art
A far-off relative of mine is an expert at,you guessed it, fly-catching. Swatting mosquitoes is way too common, but as far as my knowledge goes, fly-catching is an unique art. Years and years ago, when the world was ignorant about animal rights (or more precisely insect rights in this case. Sure Maneka Gandhi wouldn't mind even now???) and people were too naive to care about the poor fly, this man's talent was a huge hit with us kids. He would be just sitting there as laid back and as relaxed as ...George Bush speaking to an audience of chimps (???) . We would be waiting with a heart-in-the-mouth tension for that blink-and-you-miss move(literally!). Zap!There it comes! ...Dead silence.... Of course, you missed it (Not to bother, he always showed us the slow motion later) We would all hear the buzzing and wriggling sound of the fly inside his lightly closed fist. Then with a momentary smile he would open his fist and then the fly is free to fly! Applause all around... Mind you, this is a zillion quadrillion times non-violent than mosquito swatting. As you already know by now, the fly is alive and its a happy ending, but of course...
Curious how he mastered the art ? Quoting the man himself, what we are seeing now is the fruit-bearing of years and years of drudgery. 'An art like 'tis don't come easy' he says with a solemn look on his face as the kid-me listened to him,awestruck. 'I ain't going to school,' he would yell simultaneously howling in pain when his father smacked his hind side with a smooth cane non-stop 'until I catch a 100 flies today '. It was his passion. Its no surprise today there's no better goddamn fly-catcher in the whole wide world (He's the only one as of now,but that a totally irrelevant point and out of context). I can as far as go and say I drew inspiration from him, I mean not in fly-catching (he advised me not to get into it as I never had the fire-in-the-belly passion to catch flies), but in everything else I did. I cannot with all my heart say I haven't tried my hand at the trick a couple of times or more, but as I found out, I was not meant to be.
Well,coming back to that far-relative of mine, the truth is that the guy never got any tangible gains from his unique talent. Nobody called him to their house to perform his feat, nobody at weddings cared for him (except we kids that is) when he caught multiple flies at a single flick of his arm, nobody even acknowledged the greatness of the art. Even Tusshar Kapoor will envy his no-success story. But then, what was so evident and palpable on his face was his contentment, his happiness. I met him after many years recently at a wedding, ( and while we were trying to make conversation, (zap!) he lazily flicks his arm. Then I remember, and ask him curiously,"Innu siktava (Do they still get caught) ???". In slow motion, he raises his fist to eye-level, opens it, and as I watch with open-mouthed wonder, a fly bursts out and flies off into the air, gradually bringing wrinkled face back into focus, smiling proudly at me. He wistfully adds, 'Ain't no enough flies to catch these days. Maybe they should file for extinction' . I couldn't bring myself to tell him he ought to stop this now....
Curious how he mastered the art ? Quoting the man himself, what we are seeing now is the fruit-bearing of years and years of drudgery. 'An art like 'tis don't come easy' he says with a solemn look on his face as the kid-me listened to him,awestruck. 'I ain't going to school,' he would yell simultaneously howling in pain when his father smacked his hind side with a smooth cane non-stop 'until I catch a 100 flies today '. It was his passion. Its no surprise today there's no better goddamn fly-catcher in the whole wide world (He's the only one as of now,but that a totally irrelevant point and out of context). I can as far as go and say I drew inspiration from him, I mean not in fly-catching (he advised me not to get into it as I never had the fire-in-the-belly passion to catch flies), but in everything else I did. I cannot with all my heart say I haven't tried my hand at the trick a couple of times or more, but as I found out, I was not meant to be.
Well,coming back to that far-relative of mine, the truth is that the guy never got any tangible gains from his unique talent. Nobody called him to their house to perform his feat, nobody at weddings cared for him (except we kids that is) when he caught multiple flies at a single flick of his arm, nobody even acknowledged the greatness of the art. Even Tusshar Kapoor will envy his no-success story. But then, what was so evident and palpable on his face was his contentment, his happiness. I met him after many years recently at a wedding, ( and while we were trying to make conversation, (zap!) he lazily flicks his arm. Then I remember, and ask him curiously,"Innu siktava (Do they still get caught) ???". In slow motion, he raises his fist to eye-level, opens it, and as I watch with open-mouthed wonder, a fly bursts out and flies off into the air, gradually bringing wrinkled face back into focus, smiling proudly at me. He wistfully adds, 'Ain't no enough flies to catch these days. Maybe they should file for extinction' . I couldn't bring myself to tell him he ought to stop this now....
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Kudremukh Trip - Part 2
The next day morning,all of us got up early and started getting ready when around 7 am Praveen's Uncle suddenly comes in saying "Good morning! Get ready fast! I've got the jeep to drop you to the trekking point".We owe him many a favor.We got ready fast reached the forest of
fice, got permission for the trek and were assigned a guide too. Next we went to the hotel/house/mess and had breakfast (idli). We packed lunch for our trek(jowar roti,chick peas curry, chatni, pulao, bananas - yeah, we were planning to feast on the peak :P).Now we had to go around 3 km in the jeep before the trek starts. Horrible path(there is no road), to say the least. We started around 9:40 AM with a guide to help us through the trek as it was a forest area
And as expected, 30 minutes into the trek I was seriously lagging behind. Blame it on my interest in photography or inability to trek fast or the fact that my friends were under the illusion that they were running a marathon. Whatever it is, I had no plans of hurrying through the tr
ek and reaching the top huffing. Thankfully, there was another group passing by and I joined them for the rest of my trek, more specifically 3 of them. Funny part is, they were even slower than me, by choice and by situation. So we just went on at a calm pace, taking 10 min breaks for every 1o min walk , me taking pics and sometimes simply sitting and enjoying the unending view of the hills around, drinking water from the cold streams of water intercepting the path from time to time. The hills stretched as far as your eyes can see.Layers and layers and layers. And it was quite hot too. Finally, I reached the peak a good 45 minutes later than my friends ( they had come down from the top to some shade). Nothing special about the peak. It looked the same as, say, 2 hills below.There were 2 guys from the other group there. Got few snaps of mine clicked
and joined my friends for lunch.
After the lunch it was time for way back. The other group which was nearby, said that they have lost their guide and they would be coming along with us. So at around 2:45 PM ,we started as one big group. And as expected, within 15 minutes of the trek, all my friends and our guide went far ahead and I was again with these guys :D . Somewhere in between, we found their guide waiting for them (they wanted me to translate all the swear words to Kannada and pass on to them). Even though we were walking at a brisk pace,the return trek seemed never-ending. I finally finished the trek at 6:30 PM and joined my friends waiting for me, who received me with me with an ovation. I bid farewell to my new friends there (it seems someone was saying I was their only ray of hope..Gee ;))and we started off in a jeep to
the main road and from their to Kalsa in a bus to Praveen's uncle's place.
A sumptuous dinner was waiting for us there. We told about our day's experience and then we sat there talking about random topics till it was time for us to catch the bus to Bangalore. We thanked Uncle and Aunty for the awesome reception they gave us and went to the stop. We boarded the bus around 10:30 PM and reached Bangalore by 6 in the morning. Before I end the travelogue, some interesting points during the trip - Manju's constant comparison of KP and Kudremukh, Praveen pointing out everytime
Karthik opened his mouth that its a PJ, my theory of how better phones have 3 pins in their charger while lesser phones have 2, Praveen's uncle suggesting Manju to become a actor and giving him Doddanna's contact number, Karthik never actually getting to see Ambateertha coz he got network coverage somewhere on the way etc. Rest has leaked out of memory as of now :). That's about it guys, till we meet the next time.... ![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tZun_vqg3rLUqf5YKFiDlQbDeSEdoYtbKLFurUGnaJEV3TW_sWomefWwdfQAHWG-_fblCDJkad3Z0xP4izv9CsEyi8ZdqFlHoshojs_u-yvTuWxplqsa6DdnYPKrGOSBwzdGe8U2OSFy4cxNmv2f1z=s0-d)
fice, got permission for the trek and were assigned a guide too. Next we went to the hotel/house/mess and had breakfast (idli). We packed lunch for our trek(jowar roti,chick peas curry, chatni, pulao, bananas - yeah, we were planning to feast on the peak :P).Now we had to go around 3 km in the jeep before the trek starts. Horrible path(there is no road), to say the least. We started around 9:40 AM with a guide to help us through the trek as it was a forest areaAnd as expected, 30 minutes into the trek I was seriously lagging behind. Blame it on my interest in photography or inability to trek fast or the fact that my friends were under the illusion that they were running a marathon. Whatever it is, I had no plans of hurrying through the tr
ek and reaching the top huffing. Thankfully, there was another group passing by and I joined them for the rest of my trek, more specifically 3 of them. Funny part is, they were even slower than me, by choice and by situation. So we just went on at a calm pace, taking 10 min breaks for every 1o min walk , me taking pics and sometimes simply sitting and enjoying the unending view of the hills around, drinking water from the cold streams of water intercepting the path from time to time. The hills stretched as far as your eyes can see.Layers and layers and layers. And it was quite hot too. Finally, I reached the peak a good 45 minutes later than my friends ( they had come down from the top to some shade). Nothing special about the peak. It looked the same as, say, 2 hills below.There were 2 guys from the other group there. Got few snaps of mine clicked
and joined my friends for lunch.After the lunch it was time for way back. The other group which was nearby, said that they have lost their guide and they would be coming along with us. So at around 2:45 PM ,we started as one big group. And as expected, within 15 minutes of the trek, all my friends and our guide went far ahead and I was again with these guys :D . Somewhere in between, we found their guide waiting for them (they wanted me to translate all the swear words to Kannada and pass on to them). Even though we were walking at a brisk pace,the return trek seemed never-ending. I finally finished the trek at 6:30 PM and joined my friends waiting for me, who received me with me with an ovation. I bid farewell to my new friends there (it seems someone was saying I was their only ray of hope..Gee ;))and we started off in a jeep to
the main road and from their to Kalsa in a bus to Praveen's uncle's place.A sumptuous dinner was waiting for us there. We told about our day's experience and then we sat there talking about random topics till it was time for us to catch the bus to Bangalore. We thanked Uncle and Aunty for the awesome reception they gave us and went to the stop. We boarded the bus around 10:30 PM and reached Bangalore by 6 in the morning. Before I end the travelogue, some interesting points during the trip - Manju's constant comparison of KP and Kudremukh, Praveen pointing out everytime
Karthik opened his mouth that its a PJ, my theory of how better phones have 3 pins in their charger while lesser phones have 2, Praveen's uncle suggesting Manju to become a actor and giving him Doddanna's contact number, Karthik never actually getting to see Ambateertha coz he got network coverage somewhere on the way etc. Rest has leaked out of memory as of now :). That's about it guys, till we meet the next time.... Thursday, February 12, 2009
February the 14th :D
If you are single and its Valentine's day, you gottu admit somewhere in a teeny weeny corner of your mind (or heart???) you feel - I wish I didn't have to celebrate this day just wishing every idiot (of course gals :P) around. But not this time around; this year, all the singles in India have an 'excuse'. Feb 14th seems to bear more ill omen than any Friday the 13th you knew earlier.The caped of Indian culture, the utterly-unmasked vigilante, the 'Dark' Knight if I must say (On second thoughts, 'Joker' is a better name, I daresay) is patrolling the streets of Bangalore City. The Dark Lord is gathering his forces; the 'Eye' is watching over you in every coffee shop, every restaurant,not to mention any pub you will dare to enter. So my request to the concerned guys and gals - Celebrate Valentine's day safely.Do not be seen in the proximity of a coffee shop or a pub. It might be injurious to your bf/gf's health . Or by the end of day, you might end up a married couple ;)
But the whole drama has now taken a very spicy twist . A larger,more formidable force is rising - The 'Pink Chaddi' brigade. Battle Royale is on the cards. One can sense a palpable tension in the air as the day approaches.Meanwhile, a popular news channel reporter caught one 'monkey' from the 'Sene'. Here are some excerpts from the interview:
Q: What's your plan for the Valentine's day, err..Sir?
A: Quite simple,catch women in tight jeans and teach them Indian culture,in a peaceful manner,with one or two slaps
Q: Do you think doing this will protect Indian culture?
A: Think? I am not programmed to think. Next question
Q: What is your methodology of finding these 'Pub-going,loose and forward' women?
A: See, we have these 'noodle-strap,tight-jeans' detecting devices fitted on our tongues.We just have to go about wagging our tongues throughout the city. Once these 'futuristic' devices detect something, they start beeping and that's the time we go berserk
Q: And what plans do you have to counter the 'pink chaddi' campaign?
A: Don't you know of a guy who wears 'red chaddi' and protects the world? Red nahi to pink hi sahi
Q: The original 'SriRamaSene' had only one agenda : to save their queen from the clutches of Ravana and bring her back. Isn't it ironic that you are one of 'Sene' and have plans which are quite deviating from the original one?
A : There was no other 'ShriRamasene'. We are the only authentic 'monkeys' of our kind (much cheering in the background) and our only aim is to protect the Indian Culture
(Suddenly the device starts beeping and he realizes the reporter is wearing a tight jeans. End of interview. It was reported later that the reporter was safe, much to the chagrin of the 'Joker' and his followers)
Happy Valentine's Day :)
But the whole drama has now taken a very spicy twist . A larger,more formidable force is rising - The 'Pink Chaddi' brigade. Battle Royale is on the cards. One can sense a palpable tension in the air as the day approaches.Meanwhile, a popular news channel reporter caught one 'monkey' from the 'Sene'. Here are some excerpts from the interview:
Q: What's your plan for the Valentine's day, err..Sir?
A: Quite simple,catch women in tight jeans and teach them Indian culture,in a peaceful manner,with one or two slaps
Q: Do you think doing this will protect Indian culture?
A: Think? I am not programmed to think. Next question
Q: What is your methodology of finding these 'Pub-going,loose and forward' women?
A: See, we have these 'noodle-strap,tight-jeans' detecting devices fitted on our tongues.We just have to go about wagging our tongues throughout the city. Once these 'futuristic' devices detect something, they start beeping and that's the time we go berserk
Q: And what plans do you have to counter the 'pink chaddi' campaign?
A: Don't you know of a guy who wears 'red chaddi' and protects the world? Red nahi to pink hi sahi
Q: The original 'SriRamaSene' had only one agenda : to save their queen from the clutches of Ravana and bring her back. Isn't it ironic that you are one of 'Sene' and have plans which are quite deviating from the original one?
A : There was no other 'ShriRamasene'. We are the only authentic 'monkeys' of our kind (much cheering in the background) and our only aim is to protect the Indian Culture
(Suddenly the device starts beeping and he realizes the reporter is wearing a tight jeans. End of interview. It was reported later that the reporter was safe, much to the chagrin of the 'Joker' and his followers)
Happy Valentine's Day :)
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