The legend of Masala-X

I am pining.I am pining my dinners away.The sambar masala which mom packed (lets call it masala-X for easy readability) me for Diwali is nowhere to be seen. No ordinary powder this one. One look at it and you would be reminded of gunpowder. Bend down a little and smell it and the spicy flavor of it intoxicates . Just don't get your nose too close,for all you'll get is fits of sneezing and coughing. You have been warned.You might not convinced yet.Let me compare this to the popular MTR Sambar masala. The most efficient way of putting it is this :

That sums it up (I knew my calculus would be put to good use someday). Few of us might argue there is no way one can integrate MTR masala from 0 to e powered x to get some mom's sambar masala. If that's the case,you are cordially invited to a Sunday afternoon sambar-rice lunch to my place over which I will prove to you beyond doubt the above equation. Fine, we shall take a more real-life example for the present, say traffic in Hyderabad. Another mathematical equation comes handy again :

                 Masala-X : MTR's   : :  Hyderabad city traffic : Galli traffic in Ejipura

An inquisitive mind (probably one of those who had a problem with the integral)or a Bangalore loyalist would raise a question as to why Hyderabad was quoted and not Bangalore, although I daresay this matter is none to be proud of. I am afraid I will have digress further assuming that my intelligent reader is capable enough  to keep track of the narrative.Lets take a simple case of a pedestrian crossing the road in Himayatnagar, a fairly upmarket locality in Hyderabad. Once you reach the middle of the road, 6 out of 10 times you find yourself dead straight in line with an adrenaline charged biker zooming at an inestimable speed, usually returning from a telugu movie at a theatre at RTC X-Roads where he would have seen the super hero (there are only superheroes in telugu movies)  beat the crap out of the 50 people surrounding him in an epic climax. At that instant as you look into his eyes, you know you are done for. And at that very instant,your entire life will unfold in front of your eyes in a series of snapshots, rewinding fast from frame to frame. Then blank.Peace.….A deafening noise. The bike has zoomed past and you are standing like a dead trunk in the middle of the road,heart in your mouth You have been warned. Again.

Now that we have effectively described the credentials of this masala powder, I have to clarify one more thing. Granny will be stirring in her grave hearing me address the legendary Masala-X as mom's, for it was her patented recipe. As a kid, when I visited grandma's place for summer holidays, I would get down the auto and run straight to he kitchen shouting "Ajjjjji, masale haaki huli madidiii?"(Grandma,have you prepared the sambar adding the masala?) Grandma would walk to me at a slow pace, chuckling, peck me on my mouth (Why do grannys do that!?) and then open the container to proudly display the brownish-red sambar, its aroma filling the entire kitchen.And then we cousins would have the rice and sambar for dinner,with dollops of ghee to add, sometimes in the verandah by moonlight. My summer holidays were made of such memories :). Ajjis and Ajjas have gone, but their legacy remains.

So what now? I have lost all hopes of finding masala-X. And so the X-factor wil be missing in my dinner till I go home next time. Until then, I will just have to make do with the e^x times differentiated version from the MTRs.

Things I want to do

I have been content off late.And happy. Given my enthusiasm for a variety of things, there are few chances of this contentment phase slipping into the indifference phase and then the rut phase (get it?), but I dont want to take chances. And I am serious about improvising myself. So I am penning this list here. Ah, I am being careful to mention these are things I 'want' to do, not things I 'will' do. Thats because some of these are realistic short term goals, long term goals and some mere wishes as of now. Positively, many of them should convert into my new year resolutions.

I want to:

• Go on a long trip. No planning, no time frame, no destination in mind. I have a serious urge to do this alone. Something major has to happen to trigger this
  
• Be less rude to close friends.
• Get out of my comfort zone as often as possible. I take time to get out of my comfort zone.I've done better off late, but I want to really push it now.
• Speak to more people, even strangers. I want to think there are wonderful people around us and life can be more colorful :)
  
• Make my CS degree speak. Brush up on my rusty programming skills.
• Achieve 20 burpees. The prison workout!
  
• Improve my stock market gyaan and prediction skills. Make it a major source of income ;)
  
• Blog more. I am not sure what kind of reactions this will evoke, but I want to use it like a diary more often,writing to myself
• Inculcate discipline.  I know this does not do justice to the title of the blog, but lets not worry too soon
• Learn whistling! How many more magic moments and great sequences will I let pass away while i just sit there while watching movies? I need to take a day and get this done with

This should be fine for now. Suggestions from friends and well-wishers are welcome :)

For those who are looking, the I-am-not-going-to list :

• I-am-not-going-to stop watching anime
• I-am-not-going-to stop visiting reddit.com
• I-am-not-going-to be polite with my friends
• I am not going to keep my room spotless clean.. you will figure out the rest

***
Its my blog's birthday on Oct 24th! Precious words from the kid himself : I have to say I am quite happy how Mr.Chaotic has shaped me. I think I am growing up to be a cool,cool person. I have to admit though, that I am still a struggling blog .We need to work on this,dad. Advanced Thanks for all your wishes. Gifts wil be appreciated even more. Keep visiting :)

There, you heard the guy. Happy Birthday Blog. And many happy returns :) :)

Small is BIG!

Who doesn't love Maggi? For most of us, Maggi is the favorite hungry-at-midnight snack, the rainy-evenings snack, too-hungry-to-cook snack, just-wanna-have-something-spicy snack and so on. I am yet to come across a person who says "I hate Maggi". And when I do, I would think twice before continuing the conversation :D. Anyways, the point I am trying to make is, few things around us seem like they are too simple and small to be bestowed with such popularity,yet definitely NOT overrated.

This is how I came to make this pointless list while trying to kill time during the 12-hour bus journey last week. (There was a return journey too. Expect more posts :P)

Andaz Apna Apna: This movie is now a cult classic. You just can't watch the movie enough times. And all your friends will agree. But I am sure no one associated with the movie would have thought the movie would garner such a huge fan following in years to come; more so when the movie was actually a flop when it was released(I know,such blasphemy!).

Horoscopes : Most(I cant get myself to say all) horoscopes are fake. Today's prediction for Leo maybe an exact copy-paste of yesterday's Taurus'. Everyone knows it.But it makes for great fun during coffee breaks or just comparing yours with your best friend's :). And on few hilarious days, you get lines like this : You will find the love of your life today. (And so)Your day will be filled with mental anxiety and tension

Cats: At a broad level, a Cat is just a domestic animal. Comes relatively low in the food cycle. Kids know it only because it helps them remember the letter 'C'. It does nothing, just whiles away most of its life sleeping,looks bored when awake and ignores you completely;let alone try to impress you, like your dog. But you can't deny cats are amazing creatures. The feline charm is indisputable.Its just the lineage you see.

Old DD presentations: Being born and brought up in a media-starved generation does this to you. You see the Ek-Anek Video and go into huge fits of nostalgia and tell all your friends about how wonderful it feels. You download/copy episodes of Byomkesh Bakshi or The Flop Show (remember Jaspal Bhatti?) and watch them religiously even though a 5-yr-old kid will tell you there are too many loopholes or way too many PJs. Nostalgia sure is a wonderful feeling :) (I was careful not to mention Mahabharat,Ramayan or Mile sur mera... here. They were meant to be huge)

Good morning : Things are getting a bit mushy,but I'll plough on. Such a simple phrase and from an age-old culture. Maybe as just a token expression to trigger a conversation or a well meant wish for someone close, the surprising fact is that even after centuries of usage, it does not sound cliched and hasn't got replaced with some modern form of expression. Hello got abridged to Hi,hey etc, wassup came into being but Good morning remains :)

The TV Remote :The TV was a path-breaking invention. Agreed. But the remote? May be when it was first introduced, most people would have frowned "at it as being useless and redundant. But now, the remote is as big, if not bigger than the TV itself. The remote controls you, not the other way round. Entire families go into fights over the remote control . The poor TV just sits in one corner waiting for its deserved attention while the little rectangular thing gets all the attention, thanks our larger-than-life egos. And to think that while the TV has taken vast strides in innovation since its invention, the remote remains the same. Ah, the wonders of modern technology!

Coffee: I am not a coffee person; and I know being a software professional , I'm an exception to the rule. I seriously don't understand why people go ga-ga over coffee. I mean, why the hell would anyone want to have a hot beverage on a hot summer day,that too at 11 AM? Beats me. I can't imagine a scene where the guy who invented coffee, had a first sip of it, and went "EUREKA! This thing is gonna be huge!" But easy to imagine for, say, an ice-cream or a pastry!

I hope this list did make some sense. Now try coming up with more such things and post here ;)

***
Turns out I have not been keeping check of my spending off late. To compensate, I have decided I will be a total kanjoos for some time. The agenda is no treats for myself or friends, absolutely no shopping, no birthday gifts, bargaining wherever possible and more. In short, I am going to be a total ass when it comes to money. Till November end that is. (3 days during Diwali are exempted though ;)) To make it formal, lets have a tag for this.

BJP: The Jas-not-want-ed situation

Last week I heard a couple of friends lamenting the pathetic state BJP is in now. It is true. The "party with a difference" has morphed into a "party with lot of differences". Lets analyze. Should we start with why Mr.Jaswant Singh, an ex- in the party, had a brainwave that he should write a book on Jinnah, or in the first place,write a book? Varied possibilities shoot out. Just to kill time, to whip up some juicy controversy to get himself publicity and popularity, or the more plausible wanting-to-project-himself-as-the-brand-new-liberal-and-secular-leader etc etc. Mr.Singh chuckles.Heh.Or gives an evil grin. Whatever his motive was, one can be almost sure it didn't involve him getting expelled from the party and finding himself saying this: "From the Hanuman of the party I have become the Raavan". Staying true to the party's ideology by picking characters from the Ramayana. Nicely done. But that is just the beginning...of the end.

Now, Mr.Singh takes the Ramayana ideology a tad too seriously and dons the role of Vibishana, letting out a few skeletons out of the BJP closet, one everyday. Few of you might object to comparing Singh to Raavan's noble sibling; point noted. Seizing the moment by its throat,another BJP biggie, Arun Shourie jumps to add non-iodized salt to BJP wounds. I was amused for one,that an elderly staunch Hindutva pro politician referencing Humpty Dumpty and Alice(in Blunderland). May be he is trying to strike a chord with Kindergarten & nursery going kids because Politics is a hot topic of discussion for the kids at that age when they are not crying their eyes out over a chocolate snatched by another bullying kid in class. Well, well, if we thought this was enough damage done for us to remember even till the next elections, few within the party did not want to take any chances. Spicy Avakkai pickle on the wounds. And the credit goes to RSS Chief Sudarshan (repeats what JS said earlier). Branching a bit, this Jinnah guy must have been some dude to be able to influence people so long after he's gone. TOI ran an article on last Sunday referring him as He-who-must-not-be-named or The Dark Lord (from HP series). Touche :P

Thus, skeletons kept rolling out of the closet. Actually, this might have been a sort of theme this month at Delhi. India no match for China,says Navy chief , Pokhran 2 was a fizzle make me say this. Hopefully good sense will prevail soon and wont get to hear things like,hmmm, Lalu was offered DDLJ before ShahRukh,says Rabri or T-Rex never existed (I don't know about others, but this would be a major trauma for me :D)

The big question is, with the biggest opposition party in the parliament left utterly toothless, how much will it hurt the nation. It will considerably. Sonia Gandhi and Mr.PM must be trying hard to stifle their giggles seeing the goings on with their opponents, BJP and the Left . BJP needs to come out of the ridiculous illusion that the party's standpoint on Jinnah is going to affect its image or the votes. It needs to come in sync with the current generation and understand that its a worthless endeavor to dig into the past and this passion is better reserved for addressing the issues faced by India,for our future; for keeping the ruling party on its toes and seeing to it that the promises made are delivered. The sooner it happens, the better for the party and more importantly, for the country.

Mish-Mash Post

The title says it all. Years later, I would like my blog to remind me nostalgically(???) of my life from time to time. So once in a while,such posts will happen (Not because I couldn't think of anything else to write,okay?). Those who already know what's gonna come can directly go to the comments section ;)

Lets start with rants. My most popular rant since last week: My bike has got delayed by atleast 6 weeks :(. I've told everyone I know that I am getting a bike. 2 weeks later there is no bike to show!!! Those idiots informed me of the delay after the payment X(. But how typical of me! This time I didn't wanna hear people say "Always hype and no action" (I knew it !!!) but this is going the same way.Sigh! Speaking of people reminds me of another rant of mine these days. Suddenly everyone has gotten busy. I have to mention The HP fiasco here so that its not forgotten :P. No groups to hang out with,to go to the movies regularly or most importantly,for the trips. What irritates me is that I feel I am the only one who is free,who is available all the time. I have given this a thought and have come with a plan of action. More of this in days to come. If Mom hears me cribbing though, she already has a different action plan ready. I don't need to elaborate.

Dieting : People(Friends at office,particularly) have got bugged hearing this from me day in day out. I checked my weight today. 81.1 kg (with clothes on,mind you). FYI,I've reduced. I have to get to 78, and pretty soon at that. As Naruto would say,"Yosha!" Oh, I've started watching another anime, Getbackers (I can hear the exasperated sighs). Its only 49 episodes; will be finished quickly ;)

Cooking at home is going on well. I had made Bisi Bele Bhath last last week,which turned out yummy and pongal last week, which was not so yummy. I'll try something exotic next. Any suggestions? :D

Coming to movies, the good ones recently: Socha Na Tha (Abhay Deol's debut and Imtiaz Ali's directorial debut), The Reader,12 monkeys. I thought The Hangover was overhyped. And saw Magadheera at this popular single screen theatre where one man stands at the ticket counter and shooes people away with a stick ("block alli sigatte hogappa") and the theatre manager stands authoritatively and directs people to black tickets. And yeah, Kaminey is here and the reviews are very very positive.

Reading The Three Musketeers and The Kite Runner. Totally contrasting reads when it comes to writing style and narration.

Was listening to 'Teredide mane O baa atithi' yesterday. The fact that I can appreciate how really beautiful this song is made me feel lucky,proud and happy to be born as an Indian. And this is just one example of the beautiful things around you. Happy Independence day :)

I can't think of much else. And, here : C&H greatest .This should make up for wasting your time on this useless post.

Finally,thanks to everyone who made my Birthday special last week. Arigato :)

Sleepless in Ejipura

Its been a week now. I have been having sleepless early mornings because of a Rooster. Er... don't get me wrong here. A Rooster-crowing,to be precise.Yessiree, I hear early morning cock-crowing,here,in Bangalore.Opposite house to mine. Nostalgic,u say? Well,it has been a real pain in the arse to me(And you can guess the magnitude of my plight if I am using expletives without **). The first time it happened, I was rudely awakened wondering who is the moron playing Himesh songs at 5 in the morning! I know you can't call a cock-crowing nasal by any stretch of imagination. Actually, I think its as throaty as it can get. Still, one thing very much common between the two (Mr.Rooster & Himesh, if we have meandered too much) is the stress on the last syllable (Ooooooooooooooo!). Oh, just realized there's more. The cap!!! Anyways, Himesh Bhai has been lying low for a while now & there might be a probability this piece might act as a catalyst to wake him up from his reverie(Yeah,right :P). I shall not digress further.

So,where were we? Ah,now Mr.Rooster is as persistent as,say,my mom when she bugs me to get the tiffin box in which she packed my dinner on the journey back from HYD to Bangalore("It'll be nice if you can find the spoon too"). I needed to take urgent measures for the problem. Started listening to 'Restful Sleep'(audiobook) by Deepak Chopra. Such a waste. The guy talks only about Ayurveda,the body forms vata,pitta,bata (:D) or something to that effect. Never does he mention a certain Rooster and what needs to be done .Not even a word.For now,I have resigned to my fate. Sleep seems as distant and as impossible as an Akki movie winning the Oscar. Since we all know ultimately what fate awaits the cock (:(), I cannot be held guilty for wishing my opposite door gentlemen sing "Tandoori 'chicken' nights" (hey! Himesh song!) sooner than later. If its of any solace to anyone, I'll say this: RIP,Mr.Rooster.

Here is a pic, taken from the balcony-like area beyond the front door(I should've taken another pic to show you the guys the relative location. This needed some zooming).



As you can see, there's a Ms.Hen too, in the background. I am 100% sure it is also involved in contributing to my misery. Only, the MCP that I am, Mr.Rooster grabbed 'meat'ier part ;)

P.S: Ejipura is where I reside
P.P.S: I like some of HR songs,actually
P.P.P.S : Gaara is back in Naruto manga!!! :))

Back to the movies!!!

Saw Angels & Demons last Sunday. A movie at the theaters after a long hiatus ( >3 months). The movie in itself, turned out to be pretty average. Langdon and Ms.Vetra keep running frantically all around Rome while discussing intelligently about Bernini's art and the other clues. That's it for most of the movie. Going on common sense, such movies are supposed to have more action sequences or something visually appealing than the books they are adapted from. Surprisingly, the makers of this movie thought otherwise. A suspense thriller sans the action. Two positive points : One,AnD is way better than DaViC, but that isnt saying much,right? Two, Beautiful Rome and its architecture :) Anyways, I hope Tom Hanks will now go back to playing those delightful characters like we've seen him doing all these years.

But the big news is....its a treat for the movie buffs in the coming months! Lots of biggies lined up for India Release. Terminator Salvation, X-MEN Origins: Wolverine (actually both movies aren't exactly setting the US box office on fire), Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs & Star Trek. I have almost zilch knowledge about the Star Trek series but the movie has got such great response (all time #88 in IMDB as of today & 95% on the tomatometer) I have to watch it after all. There's also Up (Looks like The dudes at Pixar have got an Oscar Winner yet again ) and Tranformers 2 . Then,there's the biggest of them all : Harry Potter & the Half Blood Prince . The movie has taken long in the making and it better be darn good. Phew, still quite a few movies left; but I'll stop this here :P

Things don't seem quite rosy on the Bollywood front what with the strike n all. Serves them both right: Producers, for giving us crappy movies most of the time and the multiplex owners for their exhorbitant prices :P. One movie which seems interesting is Vishal Bharadwaj's Kaminey (the title sounds cool too :D)

Enjoy the pop-corn guys ;)

"Once Again I must ask too much of you,Harry..."











P.S: Morning show balcony ticket at Rex is just 60 bucks! Even on weekends!!!